A
female
age
41-50,
*ingy
writes:I am 34. Going to be 35 this year. Shhh! I don't fancy anyone either. I have been single for 3 years. My past relationships have been with men who just use me. One for money, hid me away and the other as a ground sheet as my mother put it. I don't fancy anyone. I don't know if it is because I don't want anyone else to get close to me again or what. I know that I don't trust men that is for sure. I don't want to be on my own for the rest of my life either. I used to dress to disappear so no one would try and get close. I have just changed my job and no longer dress like that. I am trying now. I just don't fancy anyone or see anyone I like. Am I normal?
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female
reader, Fingy +, writes (7 September 2008):
Fingy is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI can feel very invisible most of the time. Should I use my powers for good or for evil? Lol
A
female
reader, Fingy +, writes (7 September 2008):
Fingy is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for that. I feel a lot better now. I just get so bored sometimes on my own all the time. I want to be left alone sometimes too. My ex keeps coming round to see me. I wish he wouldn't. It is like he doesn't want me to find someone else. He only comes round to eat my food, watch my telly then give me an awkward hug at the door. I have the last of his stuff in a bag for him to pick up. Its beside the door. The last time he was up, about 2 weeks ago, he was okay then he hasn't been back. This was always how it was. Selfish. He is the one who hid me away and took my money. £3000. Won't ever ever be that stupid again.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2008): Don't question your feelings as they are normal and I think a kind of switching off on your part from getting hurt any more. You are not ready for any more of that so best thing is to look for other things to make your heart sing again. This can be anything from a crazy day out, a short break to a city, or a new hobby. Try something that makes you feel good about you and in time you may find you are more open to the idea of a man in your life. Just don't pressurise yourself - its not a ticking time bomb!
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A
female
reader, Amac  +, writes (4 September 2008):
I think you're perfectly normal! You have had a hard time and hey, the right person probably hasn't come along. I am in similar situation but worse. The sad thing is I feel that I can never ever look at another guy again. I just feel nothing for them... but the last guy I was involved with, who treated me badly, I'd be back with in a second. Basically, I think we just get bruised and have to wait for the bruises to heal... if ever. It's not our fault. I think it is normal from other stories I hear from friends. Hang in there! Don't feel pressured to look for someone else. There's nothing wrong with being on your own if you feel more comfortable that way at the moment. Good luck :)
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