A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am currently in this long distance relationship with a guy across the country. I am planning to visit him for 10 days in July and when i had planned the trip originally i didn't know that there would be any problems with schedules. I just found out that he is starting school in a few weeks, and so he is going to be in school for 5 days that i am visiting him. I had expected him to take off of work when i was visiting ( if not to just be with me anyway but because he is in school already) but i asked him about it and he said that he "has bills to pay" when i dont and it is also "impossible to take 2 weeks off of work" and i cant possibly understand that. school is important, and so is paying bills, but this 10 days is the only time we get to spend together all year. i am upset because i feel like he is not willing to tweek his working in order to spend time with me that he never gets to have. i am also upset because through this whole thing he is making me feel like i am being irrational when i do not think i am asking for a lot, considering this is all i get all year. i was so excited to see him, and now i am not because he isn't going to even really be there anyway. is there anything i can do to maybe feel better? is there anything i can say to make him understand? ive already told him how i feel about this, and he doesn't seem to want to talk about it, and he doesn't seem to care. :/
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2009): You need to remember that even if he will be at work/school, thats not going to be 24/7. You will at least get to see him. So if you have already bought the tickets and whatnot, then think of the good things, and maybe plan with him to go on a date or two so you have more things to look forward to then things to feel sad about.
If tickets are not bought yet, ask him when would be a better time to visit. Im sure he understands, as it is logical, that when you do come you want to spend time with him. When you love someone enough you will prioritize.
Im also in a LDR, and even though my schedule is booked with work, school, exams, meetings and whatnot, I try to get as much work done before I will meet my bf, so that we have more time together. Him sacrificing his work for you is asking too much, but what about asking him to prepare better at school so that he doesnt have to spend too much time with schoolwork when you come?
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