A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have known this guy for many years now. Intially I was attracted to him and let him know about my attraction. Since then, he has been contacting me to share intimate details of his life. We have had a chance to see each other at functions but in public, he would ignore me like crazy. He would invite me to visit him, plan trips, say he is sexually attracted to me but when it came to putting the talk into action he would give me the cold shoulder and get preachy spiritually. Yet whenever he wanted to have "phone sex" he would call and get all romantic again. He tells of other woman he is pursuing and how he loves to go to strippers. Yet when I ask him to do anything at all for me...He talks his way out of it. I am so fed up as when I stop taking his calls and ignore him...he seduces me through invites to visit him..and then again..nothing?..He keeps telling others I am so into him yet privately...I think he is into me...what do I do with this guy?
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2011): I'm not sure what is seductive and taboo about it, he sounds weird to me.You may find that it will be a relief to let this guy go. When you meet someone who wants a real relationship, who is nice to you, ignoring you in public is ridiculous. you will forget about him, except maybe to occasionally think why did I bother with him at all and what was I playing a silly game with myself for?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes...I also have a sense he is a narcissist..it is the charm this guy pulls off...it is very hard and tempting to resist..and no it is not the kind of relationship I want but I think it is the attention..chase...and perhaps seductive taboo of it all that keeps luring me in...all in all..it is just refreshing to get this off my mind and share in a forum like this...it sure is not something I can talk to granny about!..thanks for the advice..I have let him go but also..can't stop thinking of him either?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2011): I don't know what is going on with him, it could be a number of things. If you have known him for years and he is not your bf/husband by now and he is not having sex with you in person, he is NOT into you. He sounds like a narcissistic type who likes to use people for whatever his needs are. It could be he can't have actual sex for some reason.
I would get rid of him, he sounds like a waste of time.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (18 March 2011):
 Okay, he goes to strippers, sees other women, yet preaches at you spiritually? Does he do all this during phone sex, because that sounds like one hell of a fetish!
Seriously, the guy sounds a bit unbalanced. Are you sure you want to choose him over so many other better guys out there?!?
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A
male
reader, Boy Blue +, writes (18 March 2011):
Why are you still seeing him when you very well know that this is not the kind of relationship you want?
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