A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend (ex now) had an argument,and as normal he walked out. The day after I joined a dating site. Only a day I know, but we was not together. He has found out and now dumped me. Its the longest we have ever broke up. He says he does not want to be with me because I advertised myself and it was so soon. What has this got to do with him if we had broke up? I feel brokenhearted.
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female
reader, Miamine +, writes (13 November 2011):
 I'd dump you too.. but that's anger talking.. wait a little while, then call him up. Your story is that you felt hurt and rejected and was lacking confidence and you wanted to feel attractive again, because his walking out made you feel like shit. Tears would be good at this point.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2011): I am the one who posted. Thanx,even though most have slated me. People on here are assuming he was on the same site. A two faced friend told him,thats how he knows. He wont come back still and has since changed his number. I will have to learn from it and have since realized how it must have made him feel. Yes, i did act like someone desperate and feel a bit embarrassed,especialy as he told people why we split up again.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2011): Did you get used and then want your ex back when it didnt work out for you?
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88  +, writes (7 November 2011):
 I'm confused, did he dump you after storming out of the argument? Or after he found out you had a profile on a dating site?
I wonder how he found out about your profile; sounds like he may have one up himself.
If he dumped you after the fight, then you are well within your rights to put up a dating profile. Now if you guys weren't broke up yet, then you putting up a dating profile the next day says you don't have much faith in this relationship lasting. And you're also opening up your options before cleaning house. Then I can see why he dumped you.
Either way, it sounds like you've already set forth a plan to move forward. Carry on.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2011): I had this game of cat and mouse for years with my ex. I was constantly making profiles so i could see hers which she always lied about or blamed me for,but would not let go of me. She was truly addicted and texted them on a hidden mobile phone and exchanged dirty pics. It was a blessing in disguise as it led me to who im with now and has brought me back to life. I guess i should be thanking her now.
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A
male
reader, appliance  +, writes (5 November 2011):
If he found out, I wonder what he was doing on this dating site in the first place. I understand his frustration when finding out, but he was there looking for girls too, he just didn't set up a profile.
You being on a dating site should not be, in my opinion, a valid reason to dump you. I would be angry too, but the reason to dump you should be something else (and it's probably something else) like the argument or the disagreement you had in the past. If you both want to come back together, you should work on this and determine if it's a good reason for splitting up, and put that dating site incident aside. It might be a mistake, but it's not the root of the problem between you two.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2011): You are very right,it had nothing to do with him. The choice of whether or not he wanted to stay with someone who goes on a date match the day after breaking up is what has everything to do with him.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2011): just go back to the dating sites. read the other anonymous females example three times.you might even have come across a lost twin you never knew you had. if you cannot understand why the guy has left you then there is no hope.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2011): You are at a loss but not heartbroken. Your thoughts on it at the moment are only on yourself. I am not in a position to call you as I have never had the need to have to rely on date sites to find a partner. Your timing is questionable and is a real slap in the face. I hope you find time to think it through from two sides instead of one.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2011): Its all about importance. Was it more important you replaced him asap or work on the relationship? It looks like a desperate attempt gone wrong. He has now left again and you can hardly blame him for that. You need to leave him alone and work on your outlook on love and life. Your behavior to many is not loveable or desireable. It is solely based on not being alone. I wish you luck.
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A
female
reader, xavima +, writes (3 November 2011):
I think you need to sit down and think about what it implies to both of you as separate people. You probably are n`t heartbroken like you think you are,just shocked and living in fear of being without someone in your life. You do n`t spare a thought about what he now knows and feels about it,his feelings are overlooked by it not being his business as you `d broken up. It all points to desperation. Desperation is not a good quality,it is easily spotted. It may be for the best you cut your losses and meet someone when it naturally happens instead of trying to make it happen.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (3 November 2011):
 Eh, I don't blame him. It's kinda like a slap in the face, like he meants nothing and you are already looking for hi sreplacement. Put the shoe on the other foot for a minute. HOW would you feel if HE had done the same thing?
PS How did he find out?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2011): I did the same thing and im glad i did because i met a wonderful guy who adores me and would do anything to see me smile,unlike my ex who hated me being happy resented me having a happy life with or without him good luck and have fun searching
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2011): I myself was in his situation. The message it gave me was a very true one and she is still doing those sites years on. If You dont join a dating site if you want to get someone back or keep them. On the other hand it sounds like you thought he wouldnt find out. What you did has nothing to do with him,thats a fair comment. What you dont see is that its not about that. Each to their own, but dating site chicks are not everyones taste.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (2 November 2011):
 Well it was only a day so it was very soon to be joining a dating site. This has made him think that you didn't care a lot about him because you went straight on to a web site looking for someone else, so now he does not want you back, am afraid you just need to accept his decision and move on.
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A
male
reader, bronzed adonis +, writes (2 November 2011):
 I think he has reacted just the same as most people would under the circumstance. He may calm down,but dont hold your hopes on that. The act itself was not the behavior of someone wanting their partner back.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2011): Oh get real! Would you go back with him if he advertised his availability to the world the day after splitting? Its probably very embarrassing for him too. To some,people on those sites are people desperate. If someone had offered would he even matter now?
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A
female
reader, thinkb4  +, writes (2 November 2011):
Everyone has got a standard. If my boyfriend went on a dating site the day after we broke up,I too would never want to go back. You say it has nothing to do with him,but that is not really the point of it. The point is,he knows where he stands now. Best of luck if you want him back,but keep off them sites if you do.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2011): Yes you are correct in asking what it has to do with him. The point here is that he has his reasons and his reasons to me are valid. Have you not thought that he may be hurt and how you would feel if he did that?
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