A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am a 27 yrs single mum to a 1 year old boy. I am have a good job and still studying so as soon as I am done with my studies I will get a better paying job. I don't want to get married as I had a terrible experience with my first marriage. I always wanted to have 2 kids a boy and a girl. My pregnacy was not all that good and I don't want to go thru it againa. I am thinkng of adopting but I am scared as I want to keep it to myself. Is it a good idea or am still young to consider that. I grew up with sisters and I know its nice to have people you can trust. I dnt want him to grow up alone and miserable. Pliz advise Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2010): I think its nice that you want your son to grow up with siblings. Of course you dont need a man to have a baby. But studies have proven that children that dont grow up with a father have a higher risk of depression. If you want to have a baby with man then you should make sure thats he good man and he will be able to love a child and help take care of it so it wont be the same as your 1st marriage. Just remember that not all men are bad. If you dont want to be pregnant again the adopt. You'll be giving another child a home as well as helping your son. If you do adopt you can keep it to yourself. You dont have to tell the whole world. You can keep it a secret for as long as you like and then tell people when you are ready. Of course you have to make sure that you support two children [finacially and emotionally]. But I applaud you for going to school to get a higher paying job and wanting to have the best for your son. Good Luck!:]
A
female
reader, kirra07  +, writes (5 September 2010):
The biggest thing you have to consider is whether you can support all of you if you have another child, both financially and emotionally/time-wise. You are a single parent, and taking care of kids is extremely tiring, especially if you are in school and working hard already. The other thing to consider is whether you want to wait and have another child with someone you might meet and want to spend your life with. You are still relatively young, and still have time to meet someone. I know you said you don't want to get married again, but you might change your mind if the right person comes along. Take your time and think about why you're doing this. If the only reason is so that your son will have a brother/sister to play with, that's not a good enough reason. I'm an only child, and I've always wished my parents had had more children, but I've coped. You're a single mother, and there are other things you can do to make sure your child isn't lonely, like arrange playdates and have him join clubs and teams. He might wish he had siblings (all only children do), but he'll understand.
...............................
|
