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3rd time's a charm - Did anyone get a third chance?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Cheating, Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 April 2009) 3 Answers - (Newest, 12 April 2009)
A male United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Are there any guys (or girls) out there who have broken up with the SAME partner twice and still successfuly gotten him/her back for a third try?

(ideally within a relatively short time period - not the 15 year split times then trying again far later, but more like date a year, breakup 3 months, date another year, breakup another 4 months...)

Tell your story if you have. I'm on a second breakup with a girl I'm deeply in love with due to personal and life issues, and I'm hoping for a third chance... some inspiration to keep trying and hoping for her back.

(My short story: first breakup was her fault (light cheating involving kissing only) and second breakup was my fault (being uncaring and cruel due to anger and stress in my life) - been broken up 5 weeks now and wondering if holding on and waiting is worth it - also using No Contact with her right now.)

View related questions: kissing, period

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2009):

My mom and now stepdad split about about 60 times over a 6 year period, the breakups never lasted more than about 2 months. Every time my mom would say this is deffinatly the last time, I'm done. It's never been the case. Nothings impossible. I myself am 'talking' for a third time with my guy. Third chances are out there

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A female reader, Original shiraz! United Kingdom +, writes (12 April 2009):

Sometimes people have too much history and it will always come back through their future and eventually be the cause of the end. Past is past for a reason and it should stay there. 3 times does occastionally work but it really shouldnt, it will always end. Im not going to ramble on being negative just stick to being relatistic! Id leave it and let this one go for the last time, i wont bore you with my story as like i say i dnt like over looking the past but it didnt end well and we both hurt so it just proves once is enough twice is the limit three times? no chance.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2009):

For future reference, if this is someone you picture yourself being with for the rest of your life, maybe try finding a better way to work out conflict than breaking up.

That said, I have gone three rounds in a relationship with a guy. The first time I broke it off, because we were fighting constantly and he started getting verbally abusive and I couldn't handle it. We got back together several months later, but we both had to change. He worked out his anger problems, I worked on my communication skills. The second time he broke up with me over distance. Again, after a couple of months, we found a way to make that better by arranging for more frequent visits. Now we'll just have to see how it goes.

If you would like to get back together, you MUST talk to her. Explain what you would need "fixed" and find out what she would need. If you can both do that, great, if not, move on. Being apologetic if you believe you've done something wrong never hurts.

Best of Luck!

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