A
female
age
51-59,
*utterfly65
writes:i am been seeing a guy for about 2 1/2 years but we have never been in touch all 12 months, he has health issues but wont let me be there for him, right know its been 10 months since we saw each other and have only im ed on yahoo 3 times, his birthday is tommorrow and im not sure if i should say happy birthday he doesnt seem to remember mine, we have never spent any holidays togather in this time im confused do i stay with him or not? i love him but i want more in this relationship but he seems not too. he seems to go to family trips but cant come to see me ( which im only an hour away help me what should i do??????? thamks Reply to this Question
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female
reader, butterfly65 +, writes (2 December 2011):
butterfly65 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you, you are sooooo right, But I am not sure if I will try to soon Iam two for two. I think i might just focus on myself and kids for know, I think that my heart can'T do this again ..... Thank you all so very much. Best to all for know ... Happy Holidays to all
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (1 December 2011):
 actually OP you want a man that is as in to you as you are into him. if he is MORE into you than you are into him you will feel pressure from him and he will feel much like you do now.
I wish for you to find a nice equal relationship.
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A
female
reader, butterfly65 +, writes (30 November 2011):
butterfly65 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for all of you advise i app\ologize of not getting back sooner , the holiday throw me. when away which was great for me....... yes i do believe that i love and feel for him more then him to me... thats hard to handle, but i will move on hoping to someday have a man be more into me then me into him . thank you all. As of right know i still have not even heard a thing from him nothing .............
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (23 November 2011):
you have not seen him in ten months........
you have IMed THREE times on yahoo in ten months.......
he does not remember your birthday........
you do not spend holidays together...
you live an a hour apart........
he goes on trips with his family. but not you.........
I hate to break it to you but this "relationship" exists only in your head... it's not a relationship... I hope you have not spent your last 2.5 years thinking that he was your Mr. Right... he's not.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (23 November 2011):
 I'm sorry but I think you are "together " just in your mind and fantasy. He lives only an hour away but won't come to see you and won't ask you to visit him. Last time you saw him was 10 months ago and since then you IMed 3 times ( initiated by you, by any chance ? )...
It sounds pretty clear that he has already detached himself from this "relationship",just never had the guts to come out and say it in clear letters. He keeps a low profile hoping that you eventually will let him be for good.
Please move on, don't settle for a memory or an illusion, there are real men in real life whom you could be so much happier with.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2011): I personally think he doesnt even see you as both being in a relationship. This is not a relationship!
That or he is loving this arrangment you have as it means he can talk to you when he wants and that is all.
I think you should cut your losses and move on. It has been 12 months since youve seen him! I'd be running after a month if my boyfriend can go on family trips, or whatever else and not make the effort to see his girlfriend. Cut your losses and find someone who wants to spend time with you!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2011): I'm not clear on how much you are in touch with him, but it doesn't sound like a relationship to me if you haven't seen him in 10 months and he doesn't remember your birthday. I would say NO to staying with him and find someone who you can see in real life.
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