A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i'd have so many things to talk about with my boyfriend of 2 years. but why is it that i never end up having the kind of conversations i have with my friends?we rarely talk much...i feel somehow bad about this,as i thought we would be able to talk about everything under the sun.infact he tells me a lot more than i do.its always been this way.we were friends for a couple of months before becoming a "couple" ,in that period as i remember we used to be orally/vocally more close..he knows me in and out and so do i .but then when i talk to him i automatically cut my sentences short an skip details.not always but mostly.we love each other and things are pretty much good ,despite us having had a few issues and quarrels .i feel we are less open to each other and there is so much of me that he doesn't know!he thinks he knows me well but i can confidently say he does not know like 70 % of me! and there are somethings in which i know he thinks the opposite of what i really am!but everything that he doesn't know in me i am sure would make him love me more if he did! so does that happen over time?i know for a fact that my friends know me better in many aspects than he does.we never talk about any topic...and he never likes to indulge in philosophical or intellectual discussions and often regards them as "crap" where as i find most people normally interested to talk stuff like that!i'm sure he has long deep discussions with the boys though..or so i assume! more over he would always talk in a manner to out smart me or something rather than having a mutual talk which has actually inhibited me from bringing up anything these days.if we talk we mostly speak about future plans or real/practical stuff.everyday things..but he doesn't know my "mind" and my views on most things .he is working and busy so we hardly get to talk over phone much and even when we do i think we bore each other its long distance for the time being btw ,but i don't want you to get me wrong,we aren't bored OF each other or anything.i just feel we got to know each other better when it wasn't long distance and now things have fuzzed out ?is this normal for a couple? am i fretting for no reason.how do i bring some change?anyone gone through this?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Auntie E  +, writes (1 March 2012):
 No this is not what a relationship is comprised of. You are not conversing the way you want because you don't have as much in common as you think you do. And it doesn't sound like he wants to know your mind at all. Why bother with a guy like this Why force it?
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