Like what
she writes?
... Add *tina to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *tina a private message | | | *tina's profile:Hi, I'm Stina! I've been an agony aunt here on Dear Cupid since July 2006 and became a site moderator the following November. I've not been able to be on here as much as I used to be, but that's because I've just started a new job. Hopefully I'll be able to be on here much more in the future. But for now, it's office work for me during the day!
Anyway, I grew up being very independent and because of that have always been able to work out problems in my life pretty well. My friends have often times come to me to help sort out what they should do in tough situations, as well. Hopefully I'll be able to help you out if you ever need advice, too! ^_^
As for who I "really" am - I'm 26, an atheist, and married. I live in beautiful Charm City, Murderland with my husband, our three hairless chinese crested pups (Ivy, Zoey, and Duncan), one smooshy floofhead dwarf hamster (Budgie; RIP Dr. Sushi T_T) and one huffy hedgehog (Nacho). I'm a quality assurance engineer and a graphic designer. My artwork has been shown all over the world including the US, France, Algeria, Australia and more. ^_^
I'm also addicted to cute animals, japanese pop culture, reggaeton, 80's hip hop and breakdancing (can't do it!, love to watch it!), experimental and avant garde films, food and tattoos (self designed).
If anyone cares to see a "real" picture of me, you can see one here: http://sushi-and-pears.livejournal.com/profile (Check out my uber-cool snob nose! haha) I'm posting this in hopes that other aunts/uncles will post their pictures. I'm always interested to see what all of us actually looks like! ^_^
I have a myspace and a livejournal, so if you want to know anymore about me for some reason I'll post the links. (If you'd like to add me as a friend on either of these, please just message me here or on either site! I've made my accounts private to keep out the weirdos.)
Livejournal: http://sushi-and-pears.livejournal.com |
|
Can long term friends become lovers?
Q. Dear cupid, do you think long term friends can become lovers? ...
A. 26 September 2007: Hello again,
You say that her life is out of control, but does she feel that way? The reason I'm asking is because you can't "force" a person to change if they are content with the way things are going.
But, what you can do is be there for her... (read in full...)
I'm 40 something, can I successfully date two men?
Q. Is it possible for a forty something year old women to successfully date two different men?...
A. 26 September 2007: Hello Lor,
Only if you are in open relationships with both of them and they know that you are dating other people. As long as everyone is free to date who they like, when they like, and are okay with that style of dating, then it should be okay.... (read in full...)
Do you think what I did was cheating?
Q. I have been married for 14 years and a year ago my best friend and I had too much to drink and we kissed for less then 2 minutes(female). I told my husband yesterday and he said I cheated so it's over. Do you think that is cheating?...
A. 26 September 2007: Hi Anonymous,
Personally, I *do* think it is cheating to do anything sexual with anyone other than who you are in an exclusive relationship with.
But, really, nobody's opinion should matter except for your husband's. You just told him yesterd... (read in full...)
After the trampoline injury, my knee has been acting funny. Any ideas?
Q. hi if anyone has ever broken off their cartlidge off their knee cap please tell me because i think i have done it to mine. when i move it it clicks and it feels like things are moving. I injured it on the trampoline a few weeks back and after a day ...
A. 26 September 2007: Hi there anonymous,
You should really visit an orthopedic surgeon. The doctor will proably take some x-rays to determine the severity of your injury. If it's ripped cartilage, then you will probably have to have arthroscopic surgery (they'll... (read in full...)
How do I get through to this guy that I'm already committed to my bf??
Q. i have a friend at work who has started showing an intrest in me. have told him from the word go that i have a boyfriend whom i am commited to. He also acknowldges that he has a girlfriend but he only wants to know me better personally. He insists ...
A. 25 September 2007: Mello Mimi,
You don't have to get together with him outside of work. If I were you, I'd tell him that you're going to have a strictly professional relationship from here on out - and mean it. If he tries to talk about personal stuff, bring up... (read in full...)
Went to Oktoberfest and slept with a co-worker (even though I have a girlfriend)... I'm disgusted with myself!
Q. Dear All, I am in a world of pain. Never have I felt like this before. I went to Oktoberfest on the weekend and I slept with a girlf from work even though I have a girlfriend of 4 years. I am disgusted with my actions. This is the first time I...
A. 25 September 2007: Hello Anonymous,
Everyone is different, so you're going to get a ton of answer that say not to tell, as well as a ton of answers that say you should most definitly tell. But ultimately the decision will have to be up to you.
I, personally... (read in full...)
I like Michael Jackson... but my friends take the piss!
Q. HI,im back lol after the update on my last question which i stupidly put as an answer i think lol anyways i have yet another question **so glad i found this site haha** anyways ive been a michael jackson fan for like,well for ever -since i was 5,...
A. 25 September 2007: Hi anonymous,
Dude! You're normal...and your mates/sister seem to be acting like jerks. My favorite styles of music are japanese electro pop, reggaeton and noise. Odd combination, I'll admit ^_^ , but none of my friends hassle me about it!
N... (read in full...)
Is what my teacher is doing to me OK?
Q. Okay i just wanna know one simple thing - is this inappropriate for a teacher to say or do? Well i went to see him to see what i had got in my test that my clas had done and when i asked him how did i do he said ''ohh i'll mark it just now''. I...
A. 25 September 2007: Hi Anonymous,
This guy *is* being inappropriate. I suggest you talk with your parents, have a meeting with the principle at your school, and at the very least get transferred into another class. You shouldn't have to put up with that; you're i... (read in full...)
Can long term friends become lovers?
Q. Dear cupid, do you think long term friends can become lovers? ...
A. 25 September 2007: Hello Happyorsad,
It really depends on the people, the situation (if they're already in relationships, their feelings for one another, etc.) and so many other factors. So in some cases, it's possible, but in others it is not.
I guess to an... (read in full...)
Am I a Freak or is this normal?
Q. hey, im the type of guy who finds it awkward getting close to people and my friends tink im gay coz i dnt react well to hugs off girls nd stuff im not gay i just dnt feel like huging people ..am i a freak or is this normal? ...
A. 25 September 2007: Hello there Anonymous,
You're not a freak at all. My husband is the exact same way as you are - he hates anyone touching him (except me). He doesn't even like hugging his own parents, although he still loves his family. Some people just are... (read in full...)
She can't have sex b/c of a medical condition and is unwilling to talk about it! I already flirt w/ others, but feel I may crumble altogether!
Q. I've been living with my girlfriend for a couple of years now. About a year ago she developed a condition which makes it too painful for her to have sex. The doctors can't offer any hope that she'll ever recover. Meanwhile I'm finding myself i...
A. 24 September 2007: Hi there anonymous,
One of my friends suffered for years with a problem where her uterin lining grew outside of her and because of this caused an ongoing period that lasted as long as she had the disease. I'm not sure if her problem ever cleared ... (read in full...)
I'm having some real problems with my boss...
Q. My boss is very mistrusting person. She insists on reviewing everyone's work personally though she doesn't have the time so it slows down everything because the works sits on her desk for days and people run out things to do until she's approved it. ...
A. 20 September 2007: Hi Anonymous,
You say that her father owns the business, so I know that kind of causes some problems right there.
Does your company have an HR department? Perhaps you and a group of your coworkers need to discuss the problems with your HR gen... (read in full...)
My mum found my vibrator and seems to be shocked! I'm so embarrassed!
Q. Yesterday i came home from work and my mum was really weird with me - very quiet and acting like she was mad and didnt want to speak to me but i didnt know why. So i went up to my room and saw that she had been tidying it up because she had a day ...
A. 20 September 2007: Hi Anonymous, Good grief. (*rolls eyes*) I say that because it sounds like something my mother would have done to me. To me, it sounds like she was just trying to humiliate you. I would tell her thanks for cleaning your room, but you do n... (read in full...)
Our 16 yr old son wants to become a male stripper when he leaves school. How can I get him to aspire to something else?
Q. Recently I got a phone call off my 16-year-old son's teacher saying that "your son is showing very little interest in his work at school and the only thing he's interested in is becoming a male stripper. The careers advisor told me this. We've also ...
A. 20 September 2007: Hello Mark, Why were you horrified? Why do you think your son needs help? What attitude? (If you keep nagging him about this, then I can see why he'd have one, honestly.) I don't understand. Can you please explain? In my opinion, he se... (read in full...)
I think I am in love with someone on this site but I have only 'spoken' to them once. Help!
Q. i think i'm in love with someone on this site. i know that sounds insane but everytime i read something they have written i think "omg this person is amazing, so understanding and everything i want". i've never even spoken to them apart from one ...
A. 20 September 2007: Hi Anonymous,
Justaguy is right - why don't you add the person as a friend and start private messaging each other? As long as the person isn't involved with anyone else, then it should be fine, right?
And besides, this post is so sweet! I'm s... (read in full...)
I think I have shaved my pubic hair too much because now I get ingrowing hairs. What can I do about it?
Q. I think I've shaved and plucked my pubic hairs too much because now i get a lot of ingrown hairs and i have to tear the top layer of skin with my nail to let get the hair out otherwise it will just keep growing. Is this dangerous if i do leave it ...
A. 20 September 2007: Hello there,
I would try this product:
http://www.blissworld.com/product/bath+-+body/shop+bath+-+body/hair+removal/bliss+ingrown+hair+eliminating+peeling+pads.do
It should help out immensly. Also, you might want to take a look around the r... (read in full...)
My boyfriend keeps me a secret - I think he's ashamed of me!
Q. My boyfriend and i have been together for 7 months, he still wants us to remain secret while he tells his parents about taking his ex out..when i told him i don't like him telling about his ex and keeping us secret, he told me that, loads of things ...
A. 19 September 2007: Hello,
I recognize your problem - you've asked about this situation before. Why are you still with this person? He treats you terribly.
My suggestion is to break up with him for real this time. I don't know what happened after you called... (read in full...)
He didn't add me on facebook b/c it would annoy his ex, and more! Is he over her or what?
Q. Is my guy over his ex? I have found rude pictures of him n his ex(with whom he broke up 2 yrs back),everytime i ask him about her, he is overprotective n blames me of not trusting him. He avoids my questions and blames me instead.He visit...
A. 14 September 2007: Hi again misscandy,
I'm glad to see that you're calling him to get your things. I can't believe he has the gall to keep telling you you're the one with the problem. If he really wanted a mature relationship, he'd stop accusing you of things A... (read in full...)
Why do cheaters always come up with the same excuses? Why can't they just be honest?
Q. Hi everyone, I have a couple questions that someone can answer. I was wondering when people cheat why do they all have about the same answer, it's any of these most of the time, " I didn't intend on it," "It just happened", " I wasn't lo...
A. 14 September 2007: Hello Beencheated,
You'll probably get a lot of different answers about this, but I'll give you my perscpective:
I used to cheat on all of my partners. And I used some of the things that you wrote. "I didn't mean to" and "I love you and the... (read in full...)
My bf of 2 months told me to F%*K off in front of his friends and I left the bar in tears! Should I move on?
Q. I had a row with my bf last nite (we have been together only 2 months) and it was over nothing - mostly my fault. But when I tried to apologise he told me to F%*K off in front of his friends and I left the bar in tears. Usually when we argue I ...
A. 14 September 2007: Hi there Anonymous,
At first I was going to say that you should leave. But then I started thinking about it and wondering what happened before he decided to say that to you.
What were you arguing about?
What did you say to him that would ma... (read in full...)
My fiance is a control freak! He's forbidden me from wearing clothes I like and slapped me across the face!
Q. my fionce is controlling, weve bee together just over a year and at the beginning of the relationship it was so perfect! now, hes a control freak, i cant even wear the tops that i like. hes pinned me down by the throat wen weve bin arguin n slapped ...
A. 14 September 2007: Hello Kitty,
Your fiance has major problems and he's taking them out on you. He's incredibly insecure, which is most likely why he's such a control freak and power-hungry.
Relationships are based on trust, honesty, communication an... (read in full...)
He didn't add me on facebook b/c it would annoy his ex, and more! Is he over her or what?
Q. Is my guy over his ex? I have found rude pictures of him n his ex(with whom he broke up 2 yrs back),everytime i ask him about her, he is overprotective n blames me of not trusting him. He avoids my questions and blames me instead.He visit...
A. 14 September 2007: Hi misscandy,
He is not over this person. If he was, then he wouldn't be treating you like trash. What he is doing to you is awful - he is using you. AND he is abusing you. He's putting you through one hell of an emotional roller coaster ... (read in full...)
My fiance said it didn't matter if he thought of other women, that he loved me. I'm confused!
Q. im engaged and afew months before we are to be married i asked if he ever fantisize about other women...his reply, what if i do,what does it matter,i love you...im lost and dont know what to do with this......
A. 14 September 2007: Hi Anonymous,
I think your fiance was attempting to sound sweet, but failed. This is one of those things that you probably are thinking too much about - he probably didn't mean it to sound the way it did to you.
I know that one of my friend... (read in full...)
He's so interesting it makes me feel boring...
Q. I don't know what's wrong with me. I found an old classmate who used to go to college with me on facebook and we sent messages back and forth and found we had a lot in common.He is so interesting, incredibly well-read and intelligent, and is pretty ...
A. 14 September 2007: Hi there Lzavmon03,
My husband is the same way, but it's about politics, history and punk music. I once told him that I felt like an idiot around him sometimes because I never had anything to say when he brought up certain topics. Then he told ... (read in full...)
Can a 17 year old be jailed for impregnating a 14 year old?
Q. can a 17 year old male get put in jail for getting a 14 year old female pregnant...
A. 14 September 2007: Hello Anonymous,
Not to scare you, but...
I'm not sure what state you live in, but in Maryland a 17 year old can be jailed for even having sex with a 14 year old. That actually happened to a friend of mine - the girl lied to him about her ag... (read in full...)
Our financial situation is getting in the way big time!!!
Q. I love my boyfriend sooo much and he loves me a lot we have been together for 7 years and we just click so well but I sometimes think that we need to go our seperate ways. Our financial situation is getting in the way big time!!! please give me ...
A. 14 September 2007: Hello Michelle,
One way to resolve financial situations is to sit down with each other one evening and plan a budget. Have you two already done this? List down all of the bills between the both of you - one list for both, one list for your own... (read in full...)
Is it ok to mess with other girls when she's in college?
Q. It's very hard to see my girlfriend in college while I'm still in high school and I'm feeling extremely lonely. If you love someone, is it ok to mess with other girls when she's in college?...
A. 14 September 2007: Hi Anonymous,
Of course it's okay to mess around with someone else...as long as you tell your girlfriend what you're doing and say it's okay for her to get with other guys, as well.
Seriously, if you love this person then why would you want t... (read in full...)
Am I an idiot for thinking his excuse is plausible? Online dating searches "just for the laugh" ?
Q. I desperately need some advice about my husband. We've been married for almost two years. About 18 months ago I found out that he had registered on an internet dating site, understandably I was furious. He had given detailed descriptions of t...
A. 13 September 2007: Hello Anonymous,
If this guy isn't having any sort of relations behind your back, then he is still a jerk! What kind of person would join a dating site, contact single girls, and lead them on for a laugh? That's awful!
What also concerns me... (read in full...)
Does it make me a bad person to do something for myself for once?
Q. What are peoples reactions to thinking of number one. I have spent my whole life making others happy over myself, being walked all over, let down, used and a human punchbag (verbally) for peoples problems. Does it make me a bad person to do so...
A. 13 September 2007: Hi there Anonymous,
You wrote, "Basically we talked about holidays but nothing was finalised..." So you didn't have any plans. Making plans when your schedule is free shouldn't have made your friend upset, and you shouldn't be feeling bad abou... (read in full...)
I think going on holiday with a load of lads is a single thing to do, should I be worried?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend about 3 years and a half and he now wants to go on holiday with a load of lads from work. i dont feel comfortable with this and have told him so but he keeps saying im controlling him but im not. i'm just paranoid that ...
A. 13 September 2007: Hello Anonymous,
I don't really think there's anything wrong with going away with some friends. If you really think he would cheat on you, then I think that's the issue you should concentrate on.
Has he cheated on you in the past? Why are y... (read in full...)
We're ready for the next step, but why am I so scared??
Q. We're ready for the next step, but why am I so scared?...
A. 11 September 2007: Hello again Charleston,
You should only have sex if you both feel comfortable with it. Have you two talked about it before? If you're reluctant to even bring it up with your guy, then my personal opinion is that you're not ready. But I'm not ... (read in full...)
We're ready for the next step, but why am I so scared??
Q. We're ready for the next step, but why am I so scared?...
A. 11 September 2007: Hello Charleston Belle,
What do you mean by next step? Do you mean sex or marriage...? Please give more details so we can give sound answers to your question.... (read in full...)
What shall I do. I've been doing an anger management session on paper and I think I've shredded it. My assistant will probably have seen it beforehand?????
Q. What am I going to do?! I have been doing an anger management training session on paper. I think I may have put it to be shredded by mistake. My assistant shredded all my papers and made reference to some of the documents. What if I did put them ...
A. 31 August 2007: Hi Anonymous,
Wow - that can be rather embarassing! But I don't think there's too much someone can say about what you've written. So you dislike porn. So what, you know? It's not like you wrote you're having an affair with someone at the offi... (read in full...)
I'm 14 and the 22 year old guy I met online wants to meet me!
Q. I met this boy over a chat room started talking but the problem is hes 22 im only 14 i know hes not an old man or anything becasue he sent me a picture with my name on i told him first that i thought he was a fake but now i know hes not. He wants ...
A. 31 August 2007: Anonymous,
What you're doing is very dangerous. You said that you know he's not lying, but he very well could be. He could be grabbing the pictures he sends you from any one of the countless myspace sites. And anyone with any kind of art prog... (read in full...)
I had sex with my brother and I'm worried about being pregnant.
Q. I had sex with my brother I only started my period a month ago and I know your not even supposed to have produced eggs by this point but I'm worried and I don't want tests or to tell anyone. Please help....
A. 31 August 2007: "Also, to the woman named Stina, I am curious as to why you don't think it's wrong to have sex with a sibling." Because I don't care who has sex with who as long as it's consensual between both (or more) parties. (Why should I be interested in... (read in full...)
My boyfriend seems to be ignoring me and saying I'm harassing him!
Q. I have sent sms msgs to my fiancee and he has not replied saying he is busy always supposedly in meetings (like 12hrs for 4 days in a row) (which i find impssible to believe). later he replies saying "this is harassment!" Someone who says somethi...
A. 30 August 2007: Hello Anonymous, Honestly, I've been in meetings that lasted 13 hours and I was about ready to strangle anyone who was around me. So I wouldn't put it past him that he's having 12 hour meetings, and I would also imagine that he's probably ready t... (read in full...)
I'm 14 and i can hear my mum and her boyfriend in the next bedroom. I also found some condoms in her bag! I'm sickened!
Q. I'm 14 and my mom and dad are split up but my mom has a boyfriend and after about 3 months of them going out he started to sleep in our house sometimes, he is nice but at night i cry myself to sleep because i can hear my mom and him moaning and ...
A. 30 August 2007: Hi Anonymous,
I have never been in your situation, but I can understand how you're feeling.
What I recommend is that you write a letter to your mother instead of tell her in person. Maybe something along the lines of:
"Mom,
I don't want... (read in full...)
I am 14, pregnant and haven't told anybody! What do I do?
Q. ok so i had sex with my bf and we used a condom and i still got pregnent, I'm only 14 and nobody knows, not even my bf, I'm scared to tell anyone, my mom said if i ever got pregnant that i would have to get an abortion. What do i do??? HELP PLEA...
A. 30 August 2007: Hi there anonymous, I've recommended the following site to many people your age who find out they're pregnant. It talks about how to tell your parents, what to expect of their reaction, how to deal with them being disappointed, and help for you... (read in full...)
I hadn't seen him for 12 years. I like him. Does he just see me as a friend???
Q. hey dearcupid.. I am 14 and met up with this guy today and have known him since i was born as our parents were really good friends. Today was the first time i saw him in 12 years or so. At first it was slightly awkward as i fancied him and ...
A. 30 August 2007: Hello Anonymous,
I don't know what this guy is like, but from the sounds of it he may like you. Why don't you see if he wants to get together sometime - maybe for a movie or something. The more you hang out together, the more you'll figure o... (read in full...)
I moved in w/ my gf and her family. All I do is clean for them! My gf notices my attitude. What can I do about it?
Q. Hello all, I have a serious attitude problem. I have had one all of my life I think?....Atleast I've been this way to my mom and my brother for as far back as I can remember. My mom always tells me, you'll be lucky if someone actualyl stays with you...
A. 29 August 2007: Hi there anonymous,
Dude, if I was given the task of cleaning up after a house full of people I'd probably have an attitude, too. lol
But seriously... Do you have a job or earn income any other way (selling things on eBay, etc.)? If so, d... (read in full...)
How can I show him I care through the phone? How can I tell him how I feel without a fight and help him understand??????
Q. Hello everyone, First to let you know a little about the situation, I've been in a relationship with my fiance for 2 years going on 3 years, engaged not too long ago, we're getting married in October. The thing is he's been 5 hours away by car...
A. 29 August 2007: Hi Anonymous,
I'll just go through each of your questions as you've listed them:
1. "How can I show him I care through the phone?" If I were you, I would not do this over the phone. I suggest you write him a letter describing how you feel abo... (read in full...)
I've taken the morning after pill twice, can i take it again? Is this safe?
Q. I had sex just as i was coming off my period, but the condom split, am i stil able to take th morning after pill. also iv taken th pill twice before. is this safe? would it affect my babies later in life?...
A. 29 August 2007: Hello Boo,
The morning after pill just has a higher concentration of progesterone - it's like taking multiple birth control pills at once. I don't see why this would have any long term affects on your reproductive system/ability to have children... (read in full...)
I had sex with my brother and I'm worried about being pregnant.
Q. I had sex with my brother I only started my period a month ago and I know your not even supposed to have produced eggs by this point but I'm worried and I don't want tests or to tell anyone. Please help....
A. 13 August 2007: Hello Rebecca T,
You say that you don't want to tell anyone - but if you do that, then there is no way you can be helped if you are on the way to becoming pregnant. If you want to try and stop a pregnancy, you have to tell at least one person -... (read in full...)
| *tina's friends
These are mutual friends, so *tina has
added them and they have added *tina!
|
