A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Okay basically, I was living in another country with my fiance but that ended in disaster so I have to come back to England to restart my life from scratch.I am moving between towns and either staying with my parents or staying with friends, depending on where I can find short-term work. I have a degree, and would like to find a job in media/film/journalism, but that isn't happening so far. It's been a few months since I've been back in the country and I'm really struggling to get any leads.But I'd like to start dating again. I'm 29, I guess good looking, fun to be around, spontaneous, funny, intelligent. I know if a guy went out with me he'd have fun, even if it was just as friends and there's no romantic chemistry. At this age, presumably men are only interested in dating someone who is more established: car, place, and job. Long-term thinking and all that? Some girl who is just restarting her life and basically has nothing, and is crashing at her mates' house, isn't exactly a prize catch. I don't really fit in with the grown up dating scene, right?So if I find a guy, he likes me, we go out and have a blast... but then I tell him my situation, is that just gonna kill it right there?
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female
reader, Stayc63088  +, writes (17 September 2012):
 Definitely won't turn them away. It isn't like you are a lazy mooch who never tried to do anything, you have a degree for goodness sakes! You had a tough spot in your life with your fiancé in a different country and you are starting over trying to find work. Everyone goes through rough patches. Just explain your situation when dating and say you are currently looking for work after a move back to the country. Don't feel so down on yourself. It'll turn around eventually. And a man won't judge you for being unemployed currently. That's what women do to men ;)
A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (17 September 2012):
 Hi
I dont blame you for wanting to date, your starting here with a clean sheet, back to square one really
I think if the mans worth knowing he would admire your grit, you haven't given up and become bitter n twisted, you are looking for work, your trying.Just as you want to restart your dating.Thats a sign of strength,somebody who's worth getting to know.
So long as you don't want the man just to 'keep' you I don't see a problem~apart from your having to move around for work.But thats not a permanant thing.
Good luck to you, I hope you find a good job and a decent bloke!x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2012): "At this age, presumably men are only interested in dating someone who is more established: car, place, and job."
Sorry OP but you're thinking like a woman, women want those things in guys, most of us guys don't really care about that kind of thing in women.
OP times may have changed but they haven't changed all that much, the guy is supposed to have the car, job and home, and while I'm sure there are guys who would only want a woman with those things too, I don't think any of my friends would care and I certainly wouldn't.
it shouldn't be an issue and if it is the guy is not for you. I don't date women who prioritize those kind of things in a guy. I was unemployed with no prospects when I started my current girlfriend and she didn't give a damn. She's one of those people that values the person and not his possessions.
You'll meet plenty of guys that are the same.
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