A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend says she needs space. Not break up space, but just time for herself sometimes. We had some issues during spring break and when she left back to Minnesota(we have a long distance relationship) things have seemed different. We used to write letters back and forth, webcam, and she just seemed more interested overall before. Seems since spring break shes lost respect and trust in me. Shes bipolar, is clinically depressed, and has an anxiety disorder. Shes still in high school and works 20 or more hours a week. I understand she needs time for herself, but for some reason that doesnt seem to be the only reason. Maybe I'm completely over analyzing this situation? I tend to do that.. basically I'm just completely lost and worried. I'm in love with this girl, everything about her. Shes absolutely amazing and thats why I'm so worried. We planned on living our lives together, and now she seems so distant. A friend(girl) of mine says it sounds like shes losing interest in the relationship and has control of my emotions. Any advice, words of encouragement, or personal stories similar? Please try to keep the negative ones out, I'd rather be positive and encouraged rather than worrying if for some reason this relationship doesnt last.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2008): That is exactly the same situation I am going through right now---hopefully they both see the light. I will keep you in my prayers.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi anonymous, thanks for the story. I just hope I'm not too late, I've been blind for a few weeks now it seems. I wish I'd seen it sooner that space is good for us, not apart and without communication, but just not always talking every second we get the chance. I think we're going to be okay. We haven't talken all day since this morning when she hung up. No text no nothing. So thats still worrying me, but I have faith in us. We were amazing together and I know we still can be:)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2008): Hi, I am actually going through the same thing right now but it is the reverse. I had to take space from my boyfriend because of a work-related event that took a lot of time from me. It was a personal choice to step away and give him time to be with his friends and focus on himself. When I told him I was ready to commit fully again, he said he didn't want to do it anymore. The time away had further our relationship and he was dating someone else.We are still friends and I'm trying to come to terms with this fact, however, from this experience I have learned that the more they pull away, the harder it is to keep the relationship alive and well. We were the same way--emails, texts, dinner, etc. Everything was great! I just think you need to give her space but let her know that no matter WHAT you will be there for her when she is ready. Knowing that she has someone to count on that cares for her best interest should be a huge sign to her that you are the real deal.Best of luck to you.
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