A
female
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anonymous
writes:I'm having a bit of trouble on the love side of things. I've recently rekindled a friendship with an ex-boyfriend, which was lovely and I'm really appreciating being friends with him again cos he's a great person, but I'm scared that things are going down the same path that they did before we were going out, which eventually crashed and burned and resulted in us not speaking for a year. Anyone got any advice on how, if we do try again, we can prove to each other we have grown up, and learnt from our mistakes? And how can I approach him about this, he's said to his friends he feels ready to try again and would really like to, but I'm unsure of what to say as he's not said anything direct as that, to me. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, pashanoodle  +, writes (22 May 2008):
 If the two of you do not identify and talk about what went wrong last time, AND then take the necessary steps to change these things, then chances are you may end up in trouble again. I would suggest good, open communication from the get go...talk to him about your fears right now...but also express the hope you have that it can be better and stronger than ever before!
I actually believe that couples who have split then reunited can make it work...but only if both have learnt from the past, recognised their own role in the problems and taken steps to make positive changes.
Also - if you try again, despite the history, try to see the relationship as new and fresh and vibrant! There will have to be an element of risk taking and trust from each of you!
I hope it goes well if you do try again!
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