A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My wife and I are both well into middle age, but I still enjoy sex - I'm up for it far more often than my wife. I have noticed something strange though: the only time my wife is turned on is after a blazing row. She finally admitted that arguing with me really makes her horny, but I find this rather depressing. I hate arguing, but it seems like this is the only way I'm ever going to get any. Women, is this normal? Why can't we just have a nice quiet life with some enjoyable nooky?
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2009): Well, technically, she's having enjoyable nookie, its only you who isn't. What you need to realize is that different people like different things and this is her thing. You need satisfy her needs. In return, she should also satisfy you fantasies and preferences and thats how you maintain a beautiful relationship. Some times you have to indulge in things you hate in order to keep the things you love.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNo, she's not from an abusive family, and she never used to be like this - it's only started in middle age.Strangely enough, it reminds me of something that happened back in the eighties: I was a bit of a lefty, and I used to go on demos. During one we got attacked by the police. It wasn't that bad really, just a bit noisy and frightening (police horses look absolutely huge!), but in the aftermath the SWP girls (I wasn't a member) were somewhat, erm, excited to put it politely. I had a friend in the SWP, and he said that the more violent the demo, the hornier the girls seemed to get afterwards.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2009): It does sound very strange. Does she come from an abusive family or have a history of abusive relationships?
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A
male
reader, softtouchmale2003  +, writes (5 September 2009):
 Some women love the making up part. So pick fights over silly things (not the really serious ones) and get her emotions all tussled. Then, when she's seriously aroused and in heat, have fun.
I'm afraid that is a personality trait.
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