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age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Firstly, i would just like to say i have a lot of admiration for army wives so please don't take any direspect from this question.I know you don't choose who you fall in love with but why would you choose to date a guy who is in the army? Let alone marry them, knowing that they will be deployed and could, god forbid, be killed. I know everyone's different and some people would cope with it better than others it's just me personally i can't understand why you would put yourself through so much worry and stress. I liked a guy who was in the reserves, so not full time army or anything, we never dated it was just fun but as soon as he told me he's being deployed to afgahn next year i've pulled away. I don't want to, i know it's selfish but i can't bare the thought of liking somebody then something bad happening to them, i don't think i could deal with that pain. A part of me really wants to stay in touch and maybe when the 6 months is over and if he comes home safe then i'll think about getting in touch again.My questions are: how do you cope with the stress and worry all the time?Also, do you think i should stay in touch with this guy or try and shut off my emotions to him incase something awful happens? I know anybody could get hurt anywhere, i know i could get hit by a bus tomorrow but i really don't think that's the same thing. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (11 November 2010):
 Its your choice if you want to stay away from him or not, everybody is different and handles things differently, but you need to look deep in to your soul and ask yourself have you feelings for this man and can you just abandon him because something bad might happen, take a minute to step in to his shoes he deserves to be happy as well, he is out fighting for his country and what he believes in but am sure he still wants his friends and family to keep in touch with him and support him, again i guess its up to you what you want to do, support him or protect your own feelings.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2010): I married the guy, not the army. I love him because he's him. It is hard to cope sometimes, but he has promised to stay as safe as he can for me, and I trust him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI guess i'll just stay away from him then
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2010): Most of the people I know who have married or are planning on marrying into the military have been dating their men for a long, long time (six years, approximately), which was before the men ever got involved in the military.
A lot of it is that they're completely in love, not just like each other, when they decide to get married before they get deployed.
It's really mostly a personal choice, and it's not a choice that's made lightly. If you don't think you can emotionally handle it, you've probably made the right choice.
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A
male
reader, mrvhappy  +, writes (11 November 2010):
I think that you answered yr questions in the second paragraph...." I know you don't choose who you fall in love with..."
If you love someone and its mutual comaptible etc you marry them right?
I maybe wrong but I dont think that people marry some one for thier job.(Gold diggers aside that is ...lol)
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