A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have no real desire to have sex with a woman or a man. The only thing that gets me aroused is my own stomach and some other young men's stomachs who are just the right amount overweight. I just masturbate to myself. No other part of a body, man or womans, is a turn on for me, and I'm grossed out by the idea of putting my penis in a vagina or in an anus. I don't know what to think or do about my sexuality because I don't feel gay but I don't feel straight either. I just sort of pretend in my life that I'm straight even though I have never gotten off to a woman. It's been this way since puberty so I'd been hoping I would grow out of it, but I'm worried now that I'm going on 19. Now that I'm starting college in the fall, I'm feeling more and more pressure to have sex with a girl, but truthfully I have no sexual desire to have sex with anyone, only to masturbate.I feel so alone because I can't have an intimate relationship with anyone because I won't want to have sex with them. I'd like to be a normal straight guy, but I'd be fine with being gay if I just knew one way or the other. What should I do? It's very stressful because I feel like I'm lying to myself and everyone around me by pretending to be into girls. Please, I could use any advice or support from anyone, the internet is the only way I can get any of this off my chest.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (11 July 2009):
 Aside from lack of sexual feelings, how do you feel emotionally? Do you have a healthy appetite, interests you are passionate about?
I could be wrong, but you may be depressed. Not ALL people who lack libido are depressed, but lack of interest in sex is a symptom.
I think that it would help you a lot to talk to a counselor or therapist to explore this further.
A
male
reader, holikdad +, writes (10 July 2009):
Constant masturbation will significantly lower your libido. Now I don't know if you do it constantly or not, but if you do that could be one part of the issue.
Obviously you have sexual desires or you wouldn't masturbate. Possibly you have some form of a chemical imbalance which is effecting your sexual feelings. Try speaking to a doctor about your lack of drive for sexual intimacy they may be able to help.
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A
female
reader, kellyxxx  +, writes (10 July 2009):
 Some people are just asexual and have no desire, you're one of them. You may change your mind in the future but if you don't then you're not unusual, there are many other people like you. X
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