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male
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anonymous
writes: I really dont know what to do. I've been with my fiancee for two years now and I'm starting to have doubts about our relationship. When I'm around her it's like I'm walking on eggshells. One minute she can be nice and the next minute she can explode, all this can happen while we are just sat watching TV. She is always accusing me of lying and tells me to tell her the truth. But I haven't lied and when I tell her this she says I am lying. Sometimes, when I come home from the pub after work, not late or anything, I'm just having a drink with colleagues, she says 'Who did you kiss tonight then?'. I tell her nobody and to stop being daft and she says that that means I did then. She has exploded in to violence before and punched me. I have family in America, I'm in the UK, and she says that I'm lying about that but they live in America, it's a long way away, what does she want me to do? One time, one of my American cousins spoke to her on the phone when I wasn't there and accused me of calling her and putting on an accent. All these things are absolutely ridiculous! What do I do? I've got nowhere when I've tried to talk to her.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2005): It could be that maybe your not the right match, or she has her eye on someone else. She could also be have problems with her family. Be supportive and wait a little while. If things don't improve you might want to consider breaking up with her.
A
female
reader, keeneye +, writes (10 September 2005):
Dump her.
It's not going to get any better, and you'd be better off with another woman.
The secret to true love is when your happiness depends on the happiness of another, and it sounds like your UNhappiness is what makes her feel in control.
You WILL be better off without her... and I think you already know that.
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A
female
reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx  +, writes (7 September 2005):
 She sounds like she has some very serious problems and my advice is to get her to see a counsellor of some kind or get out of there. Things like this only get worse over time.
She sounds like she's had some problems in the past, either in her childhood or past relationships making her doubt the trustworthyness of the people around her. You sound like you only want the best for her and want to be with her but she does need professional help. Good luck and I hope she gets herself sorted out so you both can be happy. :)
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A
reader, pops +, writes (7 September 2005):
Get away from her as quick as possible. She has serious problems that you are only compounding by your present relationship. She is very insecure, and you can't cure that, no matter how honest, honorable, and nice you try to be. Find someone else, for your own sake, and for your own safety. She is way too high maintenance for a normal guy to suffer.
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A
female
reader, daniella +, writes (6 September 2005):
your fiancee sounds insicure and sounds like she doesnt trust you.
Wen you say you have talked to her have you ask her if shes stressed depressed or got any family problems maby its just her hormones maby shes being hurt in the past and scared you may do the same.
You both cant go on like this you need to think over what to do tell her that if she dont stop acting like she is you will leave her she may realise then that your serious and to stop being like this. If that dont work then when your not together send her sweet messages and come home with flowers or chocolates just to say you love her and shes the only one good luck.
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