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anonymous
writes: when me and my boyfriend even have the smallest of rows he gets really angry and tells me he wants to leave and he hates me. but when we have made friends he says he didnt mean it. what should i do? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A reader, luisa, writes (24 February 2005): Sometimes guys look to us as being their mum. Especially if they are the only or youngest child. However this doesn't excuse this type of behaviour as it can become physically and emotionally draining. Let him go and give him some space to think about the way he treats you. That's what mums do with naughty children, he certainly sounds like one so why not treat him like one. Sounds harsh, but if all else fails it could work. That's if you think the relationship is worth it.
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (24 February 2005):
 Hi there,Your boyfriend sounds spoiled and manipulative. If you're smart, you'll let him leave and "hate you" from a distance. I doubt things will improve until he grows up a bit (I'd wager that he's either an only child or the youngest in his family), but do you really want to put up with having him threaten to leave and "hate you" every time you disagree, until he does?You don't need a boyfriend like this. Strong and healthy relationships don't include catering to one person's whims, so that he gets his way every time you have a falling out. Why not give him some space? Tell him that you like him when you're friends, but that the childish outbursts spoil the rest of your time together and that you really don't have the energy to patch up his ego every time you row.Then find someone who can channel his anger in constructive ways and who cares enough about you to disagree without blubbing and pouting.Good luck-B
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