A
male
age
51-59,
*ost husband
writes:Dear CupidThe reason im asking you this is because you have read 1,000's of peoples storys. Im very lost and hurt. I cant focus on reality. I really need some support by someone or a group. Ive been married for 6 years. My second marriage. Im her 4th. I dont know where to start. i know because i feel how she makes me feel. She doesnt talk to me, no kisses, no i love yous, no sex and when we sleep. Most of the time, i fall asleep seeing her back.. I dont know why i cant just leave her. Im mad at myself for feeling that i need her. i dont know where to start my story. I HATE THE WAY SHE MAKES ME FEEL, LIKE S%#*.... Why do i stay..... LOST HUSBAND
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male
reader, lost husband +, writes (15 January 2012):
lost husband is verified as being by the original poster of the question I thank all of you who have responded. My english is going bad. So excuss my typing if some of my words arnt spelled right. I need, i dont know what i need. I will update all of you soon. I cant think right, right now. Thak you for your inputs..
A
male
reader, lost husband +, writes (15 January 2012):
lost husband is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI thank all of you who have responded. My english is going bad. So excuss my typing if some of my words arnt spelled right. I need, i dont know what i need. I will update all of you soon. I cant think right, right now. Thak you for your inputs..
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (18 October 2010):
 You stay because you're afraid of the new challenges you would face and you've become dependant
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A
female
reader, absynthe  +, writes (18 October 2010):
 because you want to be loved, what every person wants in the short of it is to be loved, talk to her about it, marriage councelling, or leave her if you think that is the right thing, ask her how important you are to her, ask her outright. stand in front of her with a packed case and ask her " do you love me" watch for body language and hesitation.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2010): If she is making you feel like "shit" you need to find out why. I had this problem when I married my husband. My second. It wasn't his fault. It was me. I knew what my first husband wanted and I felt that was the way ALL men felt. It has taken some talking and a LOT of listening to each other for me to find out that all men are not the same. Maybe she has some unresolved issuses that she is not aware of. Seems simple, but sometimes it takes some working out. I did it and I have been happy for 10 years. Hope that helps.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2010): You stay because you love her and you want her..... the same reason as I stay with my husband who does exactly the same to me.... it is hard and I know how torn up you must feel... bet you want to put your arms around her and pull her close to you, but you are scared because she will either shrug, or get up and go to the loo..... yes I know how you feel.. In time though I think we will both either take it as it is or just walk away, but for the moment we are both weak we want what someone does not want to give us... but we will find the strength to get through this. Have you talked to her about how you feel? take her for a meal and tell her just how you feel and tell her you carry on this way, it may be the wake up call that she needs. I intend to the weekend when our daughters are away, I am going to grab the bull by the horns and tell him buck your ideas up or you can get out, I feel totally isolated and alone anyway with you in my bed, I may as well be, for what difference it makes because I feel totally isolated, alone, rejected, hurt and at my wits end probably just like yourself. Good luck and I really do hope things work out for you.....
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (18 October 2010):
 Just leave her. This marriage is going nowhere and apparently she shows absolutely no affection or willingness to at least try. So why stay married? I do not know why you do, but you have to pull yourself together and divorce her.
I hope that helps.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (18 October 2010):
 Whoops and there goes number five.
Have you tried telling her any of this, how about printing this letter off and leaving it somewhere she will see it if you feel you cant speak about it to her.
Does she know why her previous four marriages didn't last the distance? But you know something, we are responsible for our feelings, if you cant get her to discuss any of these issues consider seeking some counselling ... a professional will be able to teach your the skills to deal with your wife's attitude, although the ideal situation would be for both of you to attend. Maybe you should ask her how important the marriage is to her.
Good luck
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