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Why can't I say no to my boss?

Tagged as: Forbidden love<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 June 2009) 5 Answers - (Newest, 30 June 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *arrotface writes:

im seeing my boss.. we are very close first he kissed me i said stopped it cos he was gettin married he kissed me again and i went with it after a year i told him i fallen in love with him we had a heart to heart he said he would never leave his wife.. i know its just sex he wants i knew that from the start really.. I just cant say no to him why though???

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A female reader, carrotface United Kingdom +, writes (30 June 2009):

carrotface is verified as being by the original poster of the question

he says his never cheated on any gf he has had before .. im the only person i say why me tho all he says is cos im special.. Im nothing special,, im no looker or anything different from an ordinary girl., im confused but i still want him so much but the guilt is eating at me.. And i know its not going to get any further than just sex... :

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A female reader, carrotface United Kingdom +, writes (29 June 2009):

carrotface is verified as being by the original poster of the question

i have been cheated on.. So i know just how his wife will feel if she did find out.. I keep telling myself today will be the day i end this,, im sort of scared of what his reaction will be though..

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2009):

you choose not to say no. you are your own worse enemy. you are ok settling as the second best and you have no self esteem. you will just continue to be used beacause you want to. plse have more self respect for yourself, if you can. and see the real picture.

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A female reader, hijacked_dignity United States +, writes (29 June 2009):

hijacked_dignity agony auntYou can say no. So stop telling yourself you can't, because you are just enabling the behavior and are attempting to justify your rather selfish actions. He does just want sex, and believe me, it's going to be nothing more than that. And then you are going to feel more for him than just a sexual attraction and then he is going to continue turning you down. And then you are going to get all upset because he won't leave his wife, but then again you just can't stop being that woman on the side. It's going to be a miserable, unfulfilling, and guilt-filled role all down the road to self-destruction. Believe me. It happens every time, and your case is definitely not original. So if this the road you want to continue to go down, keep everything the way you're doing them right now. If you want to be happy? Stop everything right now.

It's really rather simple. As soon as you start accounting for your actions, you'll see that you can put a stop to everything. This isn't love. Love doesn't lie and cheat in order to exist. Kind of backwards, don't you think?

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A female reader, QuirkLady United States +, writes (29 June 2009):

QuirkLady agony auntYou can't say no because you're weak and you don't really want to. You're okay with getting crumbs and being second best. Meanwhile he gets to have his cake and eat it too.

If you really wanted to end it, you would, there would none of this wishy washy mess.

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