A
female
age
30-35,
*ngie_luvs_92
writes:ok well about a month or two ago, my boyfriend (almost a year) went to the dentist, but when he came back to school a few days later, i was holding his phone for him, and i got a message from his homeboy, who was right infront of me, then it comes to my conclusion, it was a females number under a boys name.. so i askd who it was (pretending to be my boyfriend), and the person played dumb with me.so of course i ask my boyfriend, and he tells me it was a girl from the dentist "for his brother" and i got mad, so i never gave him his phone back, and i asked the girl if she ment to talk to his brother or my boyfriend, she obviously didnt noe his brother..so i was mad.. now a month or two later, i find out he is still talkin to her, and that she likes him, i finally told him to stop talking to her, but he tells me im being childish..am i really? or is it because he liked her all along and he sees me as a backup..please, i really need help! Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2008): to be honest i think your boyfriend was in the wrong because he lied right off the bat. but then again it could have ment nothing....
your boyfriend is a jerk for calling you childish....i belive you handeled this really well....i would have went off on both of them.
ask him to stop talking to her or to not talk to her as much....if he does then you know it was nothing but if he doesnt then id cheak a little further into it.
keep us posted and good luck :)
xoxoxo
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2008): He probably does see you as a backdrop. You are right to get suspicious I mean why would he hide the girls number under a guys name?? If he was really into you he would have told you that she was texting him and shared the texts with you. You should just talk to him and pester him into telling you the truth and if he keeps denying and gets angry when you mention it the answer is pretty obvious. He's playing you and probably waiting for her to make the move to see whats it's like first behind your back and then hopes you get the hint when he starts ignoring you which means it's well and truly over. Keep you options open and get out and meet someone who is worthy of your commitment
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A
female
reader, Lizzybeth01 +, writes (17 December 2008):
 Ditch the boy honey! I don't mean to be abrupt but no guy who wants to talk to other girls and hides it isn't worth your time. It's fine for a guy to have friends that are girls but it is not okay for him to hide the "friendship" from his girlfriend. It's important in any relationship that the lines of communication are always open - it seems to me that not only are you two not completely good at communicating but you don't seem to be compatiable. Either something is missing in ya'll relationship that is making him look for something else or you're just not mean't to be together (I vote for the last ones). This same situation happened between me and my ex.
Sometimes it's hard to see the problems in a relationship because you're blinded by love. However, you just need to ask yourself one question and answer it completely honestly. Are you happy with him? Does he make you happy 95% of the time? Does he treat you with respect?
My counselor once told me that no relationship can exist with a single ounce of jealousy...it seems to me that you're relationship has not only some jealousy but also some trust issues (can you trust him??) - Good Luck and keep us posted :)
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A
male
reader, doafreak +, writes (17 December 2008):
 hey
This may just be a freind, i think if he really sees you as second best he would probly be with her instead of you sens he knows she likes him. i wouldn't worry bout it to much. hope everything works out for you. goodluck
Brad
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