A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:for the first time in our relationship..which is long distance from a while, my boyfirnd of two years ,who is too bust ,stressed and burdened with work and responsibilities in his life ..is asking me for "space" he also said that i give less importance to myself ...and though i've started to pretend not being bothered about him, i'm totally freaked out and feeling hurt constantly!i feel the urge to get someone else's attention as even i'm struggling with my feelings. but we are both very serious about our relationship and love each other deeply ,we plan to have a future together and he's told that i'm the only one he can ever marry. i'm 19 and he's 22. help ...my mother says i should be a strong focused,self loving girl.and choose the mind over the heart,that's true. but i'm finding it so hard to handle my emotions.and i am so damn afraid and regret for having brought myself to the point where my boyfriend thinks i am not giving importance to my own life. he must be finding me so unattractive right now :( he even said that life has changed him because of all the stress he isn't eager to meet me ,and that all he wants to do is sleep ! though he met me,i had something to do that afternoon so had to leave early ...the next day he slept over the time that i was supposed to meet him in the morning ,and afternoon he had another commitment.he apologized but later when i still playing up my anger ...he said this.that he came here only for peaceful sleep ,when i asked if he wasn't eager to meet me .he said why would i be?i'm not eager to meet you or my family or friends or anyone.life has made me that way!wth?? i am supposed to be understanding that because of his workload! but instead i feel hurt!!! what would happen in future?cos work will always be there..!what steps do i take to get back and be happy by myself ,knowing that i'm not single!..the fact that he's part of my life makes me keep on expecting to talk or do something WITH him! :( why are men so horrible... why does he take my love and all the sacrifices and help i do for him this way...well until some point he was thankful for my love !?i found him so rude since couple of days :'( i feel disrespected and hurt.but if you see it as a third person, i know there's my mistake of having been clingy in the process of trying to mother him! and i HAVE become a girl different from the one he fell in love with. but why won't he understand that it's so natural and accept my ways...ofcourse i would have some point naturally come back to give myself importance..why does he have to interfere in my personal cycle of emotions and ask me to keep away? i am so very confused what to make out of all this! today he's leaving and he didn't even call me up .. i feel miserable and like he's ruthless to my feelings
View related questions:
fell in love, long distance Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (11 March 2012):
 He's dumping you... Figure out how to react to that, and you life will be much simpler....
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (11 March 2012):
 Being in a relationship is not enough to make you happy. I am sure not all men come home just to sleep. There has to be a balance of work, family and life. You can suspect that he is using work as an excuse and that he does not love you as much as you love him. You find out if you can accept a man who is all about work. When you pretend nothing is wrong even though he can sense it and does nothing about it to change it, you are just going to resent being with him. You are only as needy as your unmet needs. You are free to feel your emotions and a strong man can handle it and relate to them. I don't see you as complaining too much. You are definitely not getting what you want in this relationship and unfortunately his response to this is take it or leave it. What you have to know is that there are men who see the importance of giving in a relationship, and not see women and family as a burden.
...............................
|
