A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Well, it all started when my friend (male) and I became a bit more than friends. We were friends and confidants but that little game we shared (sexually) made us a little bit more. I fell in love with him but he didn't. He came from a break up heartbroken b/c his GF left him for another guy, they dated for 7 years.He told me he was seeing other girls and I encourage him to do so, but I fell on the way. The thing is that now he has told me he is finally dating someone and is very excited with her. the girl left her BF for HIM. I felt heatbroken so we hugged and I started to cry, he told me he knows I'll find someone too and asked me why was I crying. I couldn't said nothing so when I was crying and screaming in my car alone I sent him a text asking him to please undestood I wasn't gonna contact him for a while and that I was erasing him from FB and messengers. He never replied.Was I wromg to erased him? I miss him even as a friend. he was my best Friend and IDK if he is hating me right now. Should I look for him one more time to clear things up and end this is a good way? What should I do in order to give it closure?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2012): He does not hate you. You did nothing wrong. Love can hurt and he found someone else. It could be difficult to be friends with him and he knows that. You should only friend him on facebook, messenger, etc. if you can and want to be friends. If it is too hard and holds you back from moving on then just move on. Letting go of him gives you an opportunity to find a new REAL special guy. You deserve that and I will bet that you will have real love when you love yourself. I feel for you hurting over this guy, but at least you were friends and the expectation of your heart being protected was realistic. Sorry it did not work out but now you can find YOUR real love!! Good luck!
A
female
reader, Deagan  +, writes (10 February 2012):
 I think you did the right thing by telling him you need space and deleting his messages, etc. You need time to heal and to regroup.
Don't worry about figuring out how to clear things up and to end on good terms. Focus on yourself, since he's probably focusing on him and his girlfriend. Figuring that out can be done later. Life has a funny way of making that happen for you when you least expect it.
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (10 February 2012):
 It may not be the kind of closure you wanted - and in point of fact you didn't WANT closure at all; what you wanted, it seems to me, is to find a way to hang onto this man, even if just as a friend.
I seriously doubt that he "hates" you. However, he did make it clear that he has met someone else and has moved on. That right there is "closure", albeit not the kind you want.
It would be best to recognize that whatever you had between you is now at an end. There is no more to do in relation to him. What you CAN do is to grieve for a while, learn from what happened and move on with your life.
Giving yourself to him sexually, usually does mean the woman becomes emotionally involved - but the man doesn't necessarily fall in love.......with the next man, wait until you get to know one another and see if he's willing to invest in a real relationship with you.......unless of course a "fling" and no more is all you're looking for.
Good luck!
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