A
male
age
36-40,
*witi
writes:Hie there. recently i broke up with my first true love because of arguements. i have looked at the reasons for the arguements and i dont think they are worth the love we had.now i left her a letter the other day explaining how wrong i was and how much i still loved her.before we broke up she said she had built a wall as i almost broke up with her 3 months b4.she said she didnt know if she could open up to me anymore.so back to the letter reply. she said she loved me too but still felt the same(wall) and that now wasnt really the right time.when we broke up we agreed to stay as friends and we have been very gud together like .she says she is not ready to see me with someone else. i feel the same.i still love her and she says she still loves me but wont break the wall.help please i need to know what is going through her mind.thank you
View related questions:
broke up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (9 January 2008):
 She wants your understanding or validations of her feelings. You should feel the same way as her and that makes it like you are in the same boat together.Having the same feelings or thoughts is what make your bonds stronger.
Try to find more common grounds so that there will be less frictions.Think of her often . Call or text her regularly , she would love it.Show your care and concern for her and her opinions.Make her feel she is an important person in your life.
She still love you or she would not be there with you.Think before you speak because most men don't think first but just blurt it out.
A
male
reader, fwiti +, writes (9 January 2008):
fwiti is verified as being by the original poster of the questiononce again .hank you all for your answers.
...............................
A
male
reader, fwiti +, writes (9 January 2008):
fwiti is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhi there again. thank you all for the replies.They mean so much .thank you.i have a question though. When you say i should be uderstanding should i act like a friend or distant myself from her so that she can see what we had or should i be there always when she wants to do something?.Had a talk yesterday and she said who knows what we future holds.She also said she doesnt want to talk about the future and what we had at the moment so that we both stop hurting.is that promising?
...............................
A
male
reader, chlez83  +, writes (9 January 2008):
There are ways of breaking down the wall but women love an understanding man so be just that.As much as it may puzzle your mind,just let her be for a while although that's not my style but at your age aggressiveness will get you no where.Relax and take a breather,atleast she didn't say she never wants to see you again.That's a crack in the wall.Let the walls come tumbling down themselves!
Good luck
...............................
A
female
reader, Fionaisme  +, writes (8 January 2008):
 Heya. I think the girl is just a bit scared that she will get hurt again and the wall she has built up is her way of dealing with it. I think you should just be there for her but dont push things. As you nearly broke up with her before, she may have issues with getting back into a relationship with you because maybe she thinks you really will break up with her and then she will be hurt again. If she says she loves you then i think its just a matter of time before things go back into place. You may need to work a little harder to regain her truet though. Good luck.
...............................
A
female
reader, advicecupid  +, writes (8 January 2008):
As a girl, I know exactly what she's thiking. She still likes you a lot but she feels she needs to take a break from being with you. Nothing to worry about! All she wants is a little more space, so give her what she wants! You will be back together in to time!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2008): Hopefully, what is going through her mind is the same thing that's going through yours. It sounds like you both need a break, then maybe you'll get back together. It happens a lot. Don't grieve too much, you may still have a chance. Make sure you're always open and honest with her, though. That's important to re-building your relationship. Good luck!
...............................
A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (8 January 2008):
The wall is only temporary and you need to be more loving and tender towards her.Do not argue with her. Just say that you have a different opinion and let it pass.There is no point in arguing.You cannot force another to see your way.
She has been hurt and thats why there is a wall between you two. You can slowly dismantle the wall brick by brick by being understanding,caring and be there for her.Don't forget to praise her more and never criticize her.
...............................
|
