A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I had a friend from Iran who once told me that as a man, it was my responsibility to always help women and protect them. At the time, I didn't know how to respond, but I feel that's a bunch of crap, now that I know better. Don't get me wrong, if I'm there when something is happening to the woman in my life and I can do something about it, then of course I'll help. But, I'm sure to most women my friend's statement didn't hold water. I'm of the mind that every person should not be dependent on someone else and is responsible for their own life. To me, the most important things a man can offer and give in a relationship is his caring and support. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'd like to thank all of you who answered. The replies were very thoughtful and not sarcastic. In all fairness, the reason I asked the question was because by nature I'm a nice guy, but if it came down to having to protect the woman I love, I would do all that I could to keep her safe. Thanks again!
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (7 June 2009):
 I agree with you, in the sense that the most important thing you can give is your support and your care. But I also agree with your Iranian friend. You have to help them and protect them, too. Maybe you and I live in different worlds, but what he said holds a lot of water with women here.
She sure needs to be able to stand on her two feet. That does not mean your role should be simply that of a partner, and I'm choosing my word carefully. You're her man.
If you should need to, then she would need to support and care for you, too.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2009): Men and women's role have been everchanging since as long as this world has been here. In the animal kingdom, the male choses the female based on physical health and appearance. He wants one who can reproduce well. The female choses the male who is successful, strong, and protective so that he can watch over her and the offspring and provide food and safety. That's pretty much the way it is now. A long time ago, women would stay at home and prepare dinner, take care of kids, clean, etc. and men would go out and work so that he could provide shelter, food, and protection for his family. I think almost every woman wants a man who can protect her. There are definitely some totally independent ones who take karate and know how to defend themselves completely who say they don't need a man's protection, but I think for the most part, a man's strength is well appreciated. If you don't believe that what your friend said is true, then you need one of those women who is so self dependent that she would be offended by a man trying to stand up for her as if she coudn't do it herself. They're out there so maybe that 's your type.My ex was wimpy. He would let guys say perverted things and touch me and grab at me and flirt and he wouldn't care. He wouldn't get jealous or pissed. I was with him for over 3 years, so i came to think that it was ok for men to act that way around me. Then i finally broke up with him because i got tired of him being a pansy about EVERYTHING, and i met who is now my husband. He's in the infantry.. I mean.. he'll kick ass for someone just looking at me. He stands behind me so no one can see my butt.. he doesn't let anyoen mistreat me or say anything disrespectful to me and i love it. I feel for once, like someone really respects me and watches out for me. And now that he sticks up for me, it gives me the courage to stick up for myself.
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A
female
reader, smailey2005  +, writes (7 June 2009):
Depends protect them from what being mugged or harsh reality, there is a difference. in my mind a guy should be there for me, protect me if it gets bad but i need to do stuff on my own fight my own battles thats life. But its more important for him to be there at the end of the day to hug me and love me and let me know i matter then to be there doing everything for me. Showing you care is a little more important then yelling at everyone when crap gets bad.. A guy should be there emotionally and sometimes women depend on men for that more so when they do have a problem they don't call you to fix it they call you to fix them when its done and dealt with that means a little more to have you there for the after math but girls are touchy like that
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