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We live far apart so why did he tell me not to share things hes told me with anyone?

Tagged as: Long distance<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (14 August 2018) 3 Answers - (Newest, 16 August 2018)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I've been talking to a guy online for a while now and we get on really well but he lives far away so we are just having fun. He said to me today - if at some point we have to stop talking please don't share some personal things he's shared with me. Since we live so far apart. I'm not sure how to take that. Any advice would be appreciated.

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (16 August 2018):

aunt honesty agony auntSounds like he wants to be able to trust you! It is his stories he is telling and he wants to share them with you and nobody else! However this is long distance and it does sound like you are both more penpals than anything else.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2018):

He is training you for secrecy. It works better for some people to keep all in secrecy especially when their intentions are dubious.

If he wanted to keep things private he wouldnt confide in you.

But he is testing you to see how much secrecy you will buy into.

He is manipulating you. At some stage he may ask you to secretly join him for a weekend and you most probably would never return.

You would become a disappeared mystery,another face on the endless photographic missing people's list.

So tell him you dont like secrecy and drop him off your list of contacts and consider a more transparent relationship that might hold a future with someone else.

The stuff he's told you is possibly not even true so you can discuss it with anyone you please.

You dont have to walk around with a weight of secrecy on your sholders.

You didnt sign a confidentiality agreement did you, so feel free to say what you want to someone close to you and forget about this creepy guy.

Technically it could even be a female who was testing the water as a guy.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (15 August 2018):

Honeypie agony auntHe told you not to share it with others because it's no one else business and he wants to make sure YOU know.

Whether what he shared is actually true or not, he obviously want to talk to you about it and wants to make sure he can TRUST you with that information. OR he is being dramatic for attention. Either way, why would you tell anyone about it? Unless he confesses to criminal acts?

After all you ARE a stranger to him, if you two have only talked online.

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