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female
,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend and I argue all the time..and sometimes we don't even know why. We are very different, and have very different opinions. One of us ends up getting mad and then there is always tension between us. But we love each other very much and we have such a special bond...what should we do? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, nutan  +, writes (17 April 2010):
avoid to teach eachother,if u have different openions then respect eachothers views,nd as u said that u love eachother alot except d things as it is,nd in every argument try 2 c d +ve side of it.and whatever u do whether u like it or not try to add some excitement with that.and one more thing is that dont give space 4 arguement.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2008): guess what? every releationship needs effort!! You guys just need to look at the arguement and talk it out to see if it is worth argueing about. Put some effort into the relationship and sometimes you just need to agree with him even though you totally don't! Also ask yourself, why am i argueing with him? Is this mine or his fault? If this is his fault then how cna i talk to him patiently without totally blowing up? If this doesnt work even though you love eachother so much maybe you need to take a break from eachother and just see if you guys can just be reall close friends! Hope this helps!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2007): Hi,
I can totally relate to the lady's problem. I am engaged to be married in a couple of months time. But mine and my fiance's arguments have gotten so much worse the nearer the wedding. We too are very different and have different opinions and a lot of the arguments stem from one person saying something and the other giving a flippant answer. Sometimes I feel we have nothing in common butwe love each other so much. The thing is that we don't actually live with each other and we see each other probably once or twice a month, as I am from a culture where you are able to date but not meant to see each other so much before the wedding. When we are together in person, we never argue but it's only when we are on the phone.
We seriously need help as the wedding is drawing nearer and we can't go on like this. We love each other madly but we seems to be in this horrible arguing pattern that we can't seem to shake off.
CAN ANYONE HELP ME???
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A
female
reader, kellyO  +, writes (4 January 2006):
 I must say it is good to let things out,but arguing alot in any relationship can subsquently lead to its down fall.
You seem to have pinpointed the problem here. You say u guys are opposite and have different opinions on things.
Perhaps u two should try listening to what each other has to say calmly. You two shouldnt try to enforce each other to accept your different views.
Another thing is that u have to reach an agreement. If it has to do with decision making then you two can take turns in deciding how things should be done. you can also set aside certain duties for each other to handle.
I hope i have been able to help abit. U didnt say much into what the problems were.
Goodluck
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2006): Hello
I think we are both in the same boat. My gf and i were doing ok up until i started to work night shifts. She didn't mind me doing this and she was the one who helped me decide whether to take the job or not. And i know deep in my heart that she would never cheat on me while im working or at anytime, because like you too, we have a special bond. I know it isnt her to blame for all the fights we get into, its me, i cant handle the stress knowing that she is in bed alone at nite, and it could lead to her having an affair. We have been together for over 3 years, 4 years this coming valentines day. We hardly ever get to c each other for a long period of time, as when i get home from work at 6 in the morning, its her turn to get up and go to work, we dont even get to see each other b4 she gets home. When we do get time to spend with each other on a weekend, it mostly end up being arguments, and we also dont know why we do. I am thinkin of seeking counciling to see if they could help save our relationship, maybe you could do the same. I would do anything to help save my relationship with this girl. And i dont care how much it would cost to do it, at the end of the day, its down to me to help make it right.
If you ever need anyone to talk to, just get get things of your chest, you could talk to me, i am not an expert and this would be a first for me too, but i think if we share our problems it could be a start to saving relationships We could learn from each others mistakes and put it into practise with our partners. i will leave you my email address below just incase you decide to try this. I hope everything will work out for you both, as i know how you both feel at this moment in a relationship.
Dont forget feel free to speak to me at anytime.
[email address blocked]
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