A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:The other day my boss joked that he wanted to delete his diary because he was fed up with meetings.Then he asked me if I had ever thought about doing something I shouldn't do.I made a joke and said no never because I am a saint. Then he said he thought about it all the time. So I said you think about deleting your diary all the time as I thought I was just playing along with the joke.He said it wasn't his diary so I asked what it was and he wouldn't say. I said if you think about it all the time why don't you just go ahead and do it. He said he was not sure what sort of reaction he would get. Thinking it was a work thing I said oh you mean you are not sure about the reaction from your colleagues. He said no they wouldn't know as it would be a secret just between us. I said oh that doesn't sound very good. He said oh it's a good secret it will be fun. Then I said well I wouldn't enjoy keeping a secret because I wouldn't be able to relax. Then he said "oh you can't let go? We can take it slow and build up to it." I said build up to what and asked him if he was always like this and he said no. Then I said I'm not sure that's the kind of secret I would want to be part of and he asked why not and said it would be chilled out and fun. Was he coming on to me? The next day he acted like nothing happened. I find his behaviour odd.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2016): Yes he is coming on to you, and being quite clever and sly about it. Married or not, it's inappropriate behavior as your boss; and you should avoid any further conversations about his "diary!" He was fishing for your reaction. You played it well.
If he decides to try this coy little game with you again; simply tell him that you have some unsavory notions about what he's so indirectly referring to, or implying. You fear it's not work-related, and find that very disturbing. If it's a secret, perhaps it is best kept to himself!
A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (18 January 2016):
 Is he married?
Sounds like he wants to get in your pants and keep it a secret.
And I think, for a boss he is being rather inappropriate.
Set some boundaries, dear. It's a place of work.
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