A
female
age
41-50,
*racy111
writes:I have a problem I have been seeing this guy for 3 months, he is 10 years younger than me, from the first week he was telling me he loved me and that he knew that i was the one he wanted to be with and marry we get along great together, he lives 2 hours away but comes down every week for a couple of days my kids really like him. Heres the problem he left to go back home Thursday and since friday he has been acting strange he doesnt call like he use to and Yeaterday he told me that he wanted to be with me he just wants to take it one day at a time, now this is a guy who asks me every day if i will marry him and would want to stay on the phone til 12 or 1 in the morning friday and saturday night I didnt talk to him cause he said he was tired and was going to bed. Should i worry. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (24 May 2009):
Oh dear, he's one of those types of guys. I've been out with them and they freaked me out.
He's a bit immature and he has no idea what love is. So when he feels that first rush of a relationship, and can't stop thinking about you and you are all new and shiney to them... they declare to the world that they love you and want to marry you and you are their one true soul mate.
Then a few months later he'll realise that you actually are not a perfect angel and you are a real person who gets ill and wears make up and goes to the shops and doesn't have all the exact same likes and dislikes as him.
I'd leave him to it for a while and see if this is just a blip and he was having a bad night, but if he keeps distancing himself then just end it sooner rather than later.
Good Luck!! xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2009): Now this is just my opinion, but I think any guy 26 or older who tells you he loves you and knows you are the one in the first week is a con artist and you should run away as fast as you can. It could be that this young stud simply wanted to have sex with someone as old and experienced as you are. Sorry to be harsh.
I dated a guy more than 10 years younger than myself for over two years and it took him 5 months to tell me he loved me, and it was a very close relationship, but a difficult road to commitment and it didn't work out long term and he used me more than I deserved, he wasn't as mature as I was and really couldn't work out relatioship issues that came up when we got more serious and started living together.....I enjoyed our time together and he was very important to me, but right now I am pretty hurt by him and he is in a rebound relationship only a month after we moved apart. Sometimes these age gap relationships work out great, but he needs to be pretty mature for his age, and you need to be able to trust him. Listen to your gut and if something is feeling wrong it probably is.
He sounds awfully flighty to me....loves you after only a week? Come on that is infatuation, lust and is he on the rebound from a broken relationship? Or is he just conning you. I think the fact that he lives two hours away makes it hard to know what he really wants, it would be easy to juggle you with another woman he dates locally or several....You haven't know him very long to know his true character.....
You know him best so use your best judgement.....
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2009): MAJOR red flags here. You should have been worried when he brought up love in the first two weeks of knowing him! And marriage too? This is a very shallow attachment, sorry. I know you want it to be more but being so desperate for a relationship will attract all sorts of questionable characters, like this guy. I think he'll disappear on you, sorry.
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