A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I want to be with my ex but he is going out with a very rich person now. How can I compete with this?My ex has always seemed like someone who is looking to be taken cared of but knows the value of work. I'm not poor but I have struggled now and then so it tough to by what ever he would want.We broke up 3 months ago and now dating a very rich man but I still would like us to be bf and gf. What should I do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2007): It's simple ,you don't compete,be yourself,and if it was meant to be ,or if he liked you enough,he will be back.
You don't know the circumstances,of the whole,just because someone has money doesn't mean,they are cold, or shallow,to think of only the money.
I know plenty of people,that have money,and they walk around in flip flops and shorts,they dont flaunt it,so i have to say,if he just using her for the money,she will catch on and toss him eventually.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2007): I had a very very rich boyfriend once who gave me everything except the one thing I really needed. Affection. Now I have the most wonderful relationship with a man who is not really poor but gives me everything I need emotionally. I would love him if he were penniless. If she is the type who needs money etc, you are wasting your time, as she wont change. Dont think that you have to compete, you dont. Be yourself. She might get tired of him after a while, you cant cuddle cars and restaurants. If she is a gold digger though, forget her.
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A
male
reader, rcn  + ♥, writes (25 September 2007):
 First, no competing. If she's looking for someone to just take care of her, that's something you can't change. Why would you want to. I want to be in a relationship because of love, not because I have money, nice house, nice cars, etc. Those are material, and mean nothing.
There are people who are like that, I was viewing profiles on this "date a millionaire" personals. In my state, there was one women who was a millionaire looking for company, there were 145 pages of females looking for the rich one.
If she is that materialistic, she's not someone you should be looking for. Find someone that through the hard times and the good times, they are happy just being with you, and the fact that you can both work through your issues together.
Just remember, whether you get her back, or you do not, don't change who you are. You don't have to be rich to be a good person, and I find many times those who don't have a whole bunch are much more fun to be around than the rich.
Take care, and if it's meant to be, it will happen.
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A
female
reader, sexi  +, writes (25 September 2007):
 Hi
Sometimes there is more to life than money. Your guy may just be using this girl. You probably have something special that her money just cant buy. Show him what a lovely,caring person you are.Remember if yourll are meant to be then you would end up together. Love doesnt need money to be real. You have something better (a caring heart)If their relationship is based on monetry value, it wouldnt last long, so hang in there
Good Luck
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A
female
reader, baby duck + ♥, writes (25 September 2007):
 I'm struggling for a way to say this that won't make you feel defensive because I sense that you don't know what you want from a relationship. If you want a loving, respectful relationship that allows you each to maintain your individuality but share experiences as a couple, you are not going to find it with a person that makes his choices based on who has more 'things'. On the other hand, if you view your ex as a prize to win in competition, than I am the last person to offer counsel. Ask yourself what your needs and wants are (they are not the same thing) and if you are honest with yourself, you may find that your ex does not deserve you ... or you do not deserve your ex. I wish you peace ...
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