A
female
age
36-40,
*IMBERLIE
writes:me and my ex broke up five months ago, after a miscarriage and him saying he didnt love me anymore. we have still carried on seeing each other, like we are in a relationship, although we are not. we argue quite a lot, and recently i have become attracted to a guy we both know, and ended up having drunken sex with him. i still love my ex very much and really want to be with him, but he is not willing to be with me still, and i am very confused. i feel absoloutly dreadful sleeping with this other guy, and im scared my ex will find out, though technically i havent cheated on him, and this other guy knows me and my ex are not together, and is expecting more i think, but i just want to forget it happened and carry on being friends, but he may get funny and tell my ex. i feel so guilty that i go to bed feeling bad and wake up feeling bad and i dont know what to do.
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female
reader, Jewlz +, writes (4 August 2009):
First of all, if your ex doesn't want to be with you, then why are you still sleeping with him? It sounds like you are only hurting yourself by allowing him to string you along. Secondly, it also sounds like you have been through a lot and you would greatly benefit from some time alone, rather than jumping into another relationship. If you step back from your ex, focus on yourself and think about what you really want in life, then you would give yourself time to heal, as well as letting your ex consider what life is like without you. He will continue to say he doesn't want to be with you if you are still letting him sleep with you without the commitment. If you cut off contact with him and tell him you need some time to yourself, and he truly cares about you, he will come back with bells on. If you are meant to be together, then you will be. If not, you will move on. Whatever happens, life goes on, and you have to protect yourself and your feelings. Good luck.
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