A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I recently begun having sex with my girlfriend, and although I am both physically and sexually attracted to her, I notice that I am not responding to full arousal by her body type (she has a more petite figure that I guess doesn't resonate heavily with me in a sexual sense). I vaguely mentioned that I was having difficulties with intimacy, she asked if it had anything to do with her, and I said 'no.' Did I do the right thing by not telling her the truth? Do I owe it to her to be completely forthcoming, in which case not doing so is betraying her trust, or was it better to spare her the emotional injury, and quietly find a way to work on my issue?Part of the basis for my concern is that I was aware that it was factoring in mildly to moderately in our sex life, but I continued to have sex with her, anyway. Although it was no less meaningful and mutual, I still feel that I have, in a sense, mislead her, but I also don't want to make her feel bad over something she cannot change, and possibly throw a wrench into our relationship. Any help is appreciated.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2010): Yeah pal be honest with her. Youre probably scared of her reaction that she may be upset if u tell her, which by not telling can cause bad communication in a relationship and an eventual downfall of your relationship. Your feeling is normal and once you tell her she will hopefully appreciate the honesty and you guys can work on what works sexually for you. Personally, as big and strong as I am, I like a woman I can just throw like a pillow lol. Hope this helps.
A
male
reader, Itxi  +, writes (18 September 2010):
 I have this very issue, a petite body just doesn't do it for me.
I can't help you on the lying aspect, but I can offer you some advice: In bed, it's not how you look, it's what you do. Get her to do some of the things that drive you wild, and don't focus on how 'ready' you are, just go with the flow. My girlfriend is petite, but all she has to do is bite me in the right place on my neck and I go wild.
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A
female
reader, cooListic kid  +, writes (18 September 2010):
 I'm defiantly not gonna say lying is a good thing, but if it was me and my boyfriend told me my body type didn't do it for him, i would be pretty taken back it would make me feel very unappealing and a little hurt. I would say spare her feelings even if you did tell her and she sounded like she took it well, i can guarantee she'll just be holding it in. aybe you just need to look at it from a different point of view: different positions, fulfilling some fantasies, dressing up. It might be hard now buttry focusing on something else that you really love about her body and try and block out a "flaw" you see in her through your eyes. If your worried about hurting her or something because shes petite i defiantly wouldn't!
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