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Tips on how not to gag when giving BJ?

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Question - (8 April 2009) 5 Answers - (Newest, 9 April 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Dear Cupid

I don't enjoy giving BJ's but my boyfriend (obviously) likes them. I feel bad because he gives me head all the time and for nothing in return, but I know that he wants to get them more...

Does anyone have any advice on how to give a really good BJ or at least some advice on how NOT to gag. (that sounds bad but I do gag.) I just want to please him. Anything will help


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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2009):

to give a good bj u dont have to go all the way down his shaft.most men really enjoy it if u pay attention to just the head and give him a hand job to the bottom half.or you can also turn ur head to one side and make show he goes into the inside of ur cheek and not down ur throat.these two really works for me and ive had no complants,so give it a go.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2009):

thanks for the heads up guys and girls, i learnt something new here. see you can teach an old gal new tricks.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2009):

Keep your hand wrapped around his penis so that only a length you're comfortable with can get past your lips. So even if he bucks you can't end up with more than you're comfortable with. Some guys like to be actively involved -- holding your head and trying to control the action. Make it clear that his hands have nothing to do with the process -- you stay in control the whole way through, so that nothing takes you past your comfort zone.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (8 April 2009):

Honeypie agony aunt

As far as the gagging. Well start out with NOT trying to do deep throat. That honestly takes pratice for most. Use your hands in conjunction with your lips/mouth. Also find a position YOU are comfortable in.

Buy the book "Tickle my Pickle" ( can get it from and read it, it's full of some really awesome tips.

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A female reader, k_c100 United Kingdom +, writes (8 April 2009):

k_c100 agony auntI used to be the same as you - I couldnt do it because I would be gagging all the time (even the thought of it used to make me gag!). But I found that the more I did it, the more I would get used to it! So practice does make perfect!

Try breating through your nose, this helps to stop you gagging. And every time you feel like you might gag, think about something else rather than thinking to yourself "oh my god I'm going to gag!". Concentrate on getting into a rhythm while you are giving head, and only put the top of his penis in your mouth for the first few times until you are more comfortable with it.

It will get easier for you I promise but the most important thing is just to try it, the more you think about it the more you will scare yourself! And if you do gag whilst you are giving him head, he probably wont even notice because he will be enjoying himself so much (my boyfriend never evens notices if I gag)! So try not to worry too much!

I hope this helps!

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