A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:dont know if i should tell him - IF it comes up.I tried to speak to him about how i feel, he's confusing me so much. But he thinks im trying to say "extreme things to get his attention" which couldn't be further from the truth. When i said i needed to talk he said "not this again lol"..... he should think back at the start, i was NEVER like this, i was so easy going, went with the flow etc! He seems so wrapped up in his own problems. The regret he is making me feel is tearing me apart.We slept together pretty quickly, my first time. I was naieve and believed it all! He then went distant but still in touch just not as much. He tells me he has a lot going on and hasn't been well. Thats fine, but from his actions, he has no idea how he's making me feel. I feel so much regret and that he just used me.The way it happened (sex) really freaked/scared me. Not the actual sex, just the circumstances....He doesn't know this. He has said he is scared to get close to anyone, (pevious relationship ended badly). He pobably isn't aware that im scared.ONLY IF it comes up, if we talk about it (im not counting on it tho), should i tell him, that it really freaked/scared me how quickly the sex happened (my first time - he knew) and then the way he acted after (was fine in person tho), made me doubt everything and the regret feeling has been making me physically ill. (ive lost sooo much weight!)Theres nothing he can really do i know but so he's aware of it - and that im not some needy chick or some chick who creates drama. I was happy before, then it changed.Oh before we were in contact like at least 3 times up to 10 times a day...so it changed a lot. He has stuff going on, which i get but yeah.Should i tell him how he/it made me feel after? and this is why ive been feeling like this... im not causing problems. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2008): ****FROM ORIGINAL POSTER****
Thanks satindesire
maybe so. He has said things recently that tells me he still has interest. Maybe he didn't mean it that way....and it was the way i took it i dont know.
its so hard to actually see him.
well, yes that could be true too...but i think he des have a lot going on - no job, no car, no money...and im sure theres other stuff.
When i told him i need to speak, he did say "you can tell me..im here"......
neither of us want a big serious relationship...not yet anyways. I think he thought i might have. He WAS not clear at the start tho. He lead me on a lot.
i wonder if he just wanted to score a virgin....and i feel for it....
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