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Stressed by peoples' reaction to our inter-racial relationship

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Question - (5 September 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 5 September 2010)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hey everyone, some insight on this please....? I'm black and my boyfriend is Hispanic. He looks extremely Caucasian though without a tan. Anyway we have that difference and a 15yr age gap, he looks 28 :p. Grocery shopping today, we ran into friends of mine. They waved and then gaped at us. My bf only knows my closest friends...and then, these two women (clucking like 2 chickens in a language I understood behind us) said I was in for it, white men used black women blah. My bf knows I speak that tongue and asked for translation. I told him and he laughed but then, hugged me when I didn't. Then, he called me his "negrita" and kissed me, I didn't feel better. Outside, stares again! Ppl looking puzzled. Yeesh! My bf didnt seem to notice anything but I was ready to rip off my shirt and go Hulk! Later, I kept noticing how much he called me "negrita" and obviously, he notes our differences. But, its so easy for him to shrug off ppl staring etc....I love him but I cant ever talk to him about this, what to do...

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A male reader, serenity80 United Kingdom +, writes (5 September 2010):

My girlfriend is Asian (i am white) and race issues have never come up, ever. Perhaps we are lucky. Perhaps it is because we live in a city (London) where difference in skin colour is not a problem to 99.9% of people.

You shouldn't allow yourself to get stressed. The difference of skin colour is no different from one person having blonde hair and one person having black hair. If you have feelings for this guy, you will already know how skin colour means nothing at all and how crazy it is that it has caused so many problems in the world.

Don't waste your life having problems with other peoples issues. If you do, you'll be a very stressed and angry person.

Allow yourself to just get over it - it's a non-issue.

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A female reader, mizz.butterflies United States +, writes (5 September 2010):

mizz.butterflies agony auntbe proud of your interracial relationship. watch "something new" with saana lethan it really helps :-) He seems to be a very sweet guy. dont let the negativity get to you. Good luck :-)

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