A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Has it changed everything forever? I'm very confused. 6 months away from my wedding and I know someone who has turned my world upside down. He has highlighted problems that have existed in my relationship that were always there but have never been looked at or dealt with because "it was always just fine and comfortable" having been in this relationship for almost 10 years. I don't whether I'm clouded by the fact that I slept with him or that he represents things that I like that my fiance is not. I first met him a year ago through work and have kept in touch, got him out of my system and saw him again last month and slept with him. But I really wanted to...I almost planned it! I don't know what to do as I can't stop thinking about him. Do I call off my wedding?
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male
reader, maxsteel86 +, writes (4 March 2007):
 Why are you even asking? Obviously if you have to ask (and cheat) then you're future marriage is a stillbirth (like my lousy xbox 360 which didn't work straight after I bought it:-/)
Start fresh, leave them both or something. One thing's for sure, dont marry your fiance. Did you even try to fix the faults in your own relationship before getting some other guy? No one's perfect (maybe Daniel Jackson in Stargate) so of course you'll find faults! Did you expect a nice, (very) easy ride through life? Well its too late for retrospective talk. Get out of this relationship before you screw up two lives (yours and your fiance's, the new guy's probably not that into you)
A
female
reader, sunrise +, writes (3 March 2007):
 Hi, yes you do. How can you plan to spend the rest of your life with one man when the temptation to be with another is so strong. It wouldn't be fair to either of you. I'm not suggesting you break up with your partner but talk to him about postponing the wedding for a while, this other man may just be enjoying the conquest of having another mans woman. Have you asked the other man what he wants from all this, does he want you to leave your partner and be with him or is it just a game to him. So many people could get hurt, either way dont rush into anything, take a step back and think about what it is YOU really want. If your partner finds out what you have been up to you may not have that choice, stop everything before it's to late and sort yourself out. good luck x
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