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female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: First I wanna say thankyou to everyone giving advice. Yall have helped me out with some hard times an made them better, but now to the question I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. I was a virgin he is not. He was very caring and kept makin sure I was ok. It didn't hurt as bad as I thought it would at all.. I thought it would. Is there a problem with that? An now that I gave him everything I had how do I show him he still means everything to me? Anyone feel free to give me tips or advice from both female and males. Thanks to all! Reply to this Question
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male
reader, LovelessAct1  +, writes (4 November 2010):
Overall, sex changes relationships. Its a big step to take. It can bring two people close or push them apart. It all depends on how you go about it, the timing, and how you handle it afterwards.
First off, a lot of woman say sex hurt the first time, but apparently once that hymen is busted its all good *shrugs shoulders*
Second, make sure your relationship doesn't become about sex. Is he asking for it or wanting it every night? Sometimes us guys really do want sex all the time, and sometimes it is because we find our women so irresistible, but if he's wanting it just to scratch an itch, that leads down a bad road.
If you do want sex and feels it brings you closer (safe sex, mind you) then hey, go for it, but if you start feeling like when you're not having sex you guys aren't happy, you need to stop and talk.
To show how much he means to you just let him feel like he's desired; like you want to be around him. Also let him know that experiencing that step with him made you feel close to him. But honestly, right now is when the man needs to show that YOU still mean a lot to HIM. Most men get sex and keep wanting it until the woman says stop. You need to show him he kind of has to earn it. Its a thing BOTH of you have to share, not just time for him to relieve himself and use your body to do so. It takes two to make love and you need to be as ready and as wanting as he is before giving him permission to go again.
Good luck.
A
female
reader, MoonLux +, writes (4 November 2010):
 First, I want to say that I hope that you had protected sex - doesn't matter if it was his first time too. There's never a bad time for responsible sex. But I'm curious to why you think that you gave him EVERYTHING already? I hope you both sat down to discuss the possibilities of sex changing your expectations of each other, if this is something you both expect. If not, maybe it's time.
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