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Should I try to contact him or is there a reason he hasn't gotten back to me?

Tagged as: Dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (8 November 2010) 3 Answers - (Newest, 8 November 2010)
A female Canada age 26-29, anonymous writes:

So me and this guy went out a bunch at the end of this summer, he bought me dinner once or twice, we did some real fun stuff together. Then september rolled around and we're both at different unis, but in seprember the calls and txts were still pretty regular. Saw eachother at least every other weekend and he called to just chat at least once a week.

Now he doesn't call me just to chat anymore, and doesn't txt me during the week really. We went out about a week ago, but I havn't heard from him since. Should I try to contact him or is there a reason he hasn't gotten back to me? What should i do?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2010):

Frustrating as it is, I'm afraid there is only one possible solution to this age-old dilemma. It goes like this:

Do Nothing.

The truth is that there is absolutely no point spending hours ruminating on why he hasn't called you. And there is no point asking strangers on the internet either. Maybe he's busy, maybe he's gone off you or found someone else, maybe he's playing hard to get - the only person who can possibly know the answer to that is him. Trying to second guess the reason is pointless, will lead nowhere, and will only make you stressed and anxious.

Accept that you can never know what goes on inside another person's head and stop trying.

So just leave it be a while. Don't contact him, go do other stuff - watch a movie, see your friends, go to the gym, heck, go on dates if you want - just carry on with your life as you normally would, and don't write, talk or think about the situation. If he wants to get back in touch with you, he will, and if he doesn't, then he wasn't right for you in the first place.

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A male reader, Serpico United States +, writes (8 November 2010):

What xanthic said. Its most likely hes not interested. Give it one more shot.

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A female reader, xanthic United States +, writes (8 November 2010):

xanthic agony auntHe could just be busy, or he could've lost interest. Call or text once, and only once. If you don't get a response after a week, it's time to move on.

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