A
female
age
36-40,
*nly4him
writes:Okay my situation is very complicated right now and im needing some advise. ive been living with my boyfriend for a year now we moved really fast so its been a hard road. im 26 and he is 28 he has two kids 4 and 5 from a previous relationship. and i have two boys 2 and 5 from two previous relationships. he has been spending alot more time with his kids because his ex invties him to go play with the kids almost every day and he is a great father and takes any chance he gets. i do love and trust him so u can say im okay with it. we have been back and fourth if we should break up or not because he doesnt know if we will work and if he can always be around my kids. we recently found out im pregnant i was taking the pill and had a change of pills and thats when i started to feel different. as of now he broke up with me he said i planned this thinking it was going to make him stay with me. and he said he doesnt want a baby and is so upset with me. we are moving out , but i dont know if i can do it alone right now and i really dont want to go home pregnant to my parents house again. i would like for him to take part of this, he was okay we us moving into a two bedroom but not be together, i dont know if should do it im okay with him just being around and when baby is born he will be there to help me. is this a good thing to do? im okay with us notbeing togethr i do feel like we need to give eachother space but i do want him around tho for the pregnancy and for when the baby is born and just see what happens from there
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female
reader, Angzw  +, writes (19 February 2010):
This is a very delicate situation, because what if he starts bringing girlfriends home while you are living together? You need to find out what your boundaries are before such an arrangement. Other than that, I think it can work but he will not be giving you as much affection as you might need. In fact, he might still expect to sleep with you but without being official partners.
On another note, you can't ever get a man to stay with you by having his child. 3 children by 3 different fathers at your age is 3 accidents too many. Even though you don't want to move to your parents' home, perhaps you should ask them to help you by taking the boys for a little while so you can sort yourself out. You may not see it that way but this is a mess and you can't go on like this. All the best.
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