A
female
age
41-50,
*ndecidedagain
writes:hi im 26 and have 3 children, i have been with my husband for 10 years and married for 2. For the last year we argue non stop about everything. We have not had sex in 6 mnths we dont sleep in the same bed, and i dont feel as though i love him, i care but dont love him. We have been to councelling and that didnt work, he lies about money, where he is and what he does. He has recently denied me access to any money and does not financially support his children aged 5, 2 and 1. My question is should i leave him? Any suggestions would be great! Thank you
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2009): Yes, I think 50 50 split of the assets is fair....common in many US states. Perhaps your husband could buy out his share of the house and you can keep it. I can't help you with foreign law or divorce, but just wanted to say I thought it sounded fair.
A
female
reader, undecidedagain +, writes (4 June 2009):
undecidedagain is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhi guys, so i left n have seen a solicitor 2 file 4 divorce n now i hav more questions. The solicitor said i an entitled 2 half the house n his super n wateva household items i need (im keeping the kids)... Does this seem fair?
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A
female
reader, undecidedagain +, writes (3 June 2009):
undecidedagain is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthankyou all, i guess i knew the answer but im just sooo scared to leave... I have my own bank account now and we did have a joint acc but he changed his to an acc on his own and took his paycheck with him..... Once again thank you for telling me what i needed to hear..... will keep you all posted!!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2009): Children do not do well living in a loveless marriage. If you have tried everything and it isn't getting better then get out. File for divorce first so you have the financial upper hand, and set up your own bank account if you can....I would try to get to the bottom of the financial thing, how can he deny you access to money? Is this not a joint account? He is up to something and sounds like he is ready to leave himself.
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A
male
reader, F-ing Old Guy  +, writes (2 June 2009):
Gotta agree, spent 20 years in a relationship similar, sometimes, althought its hard, you just have to say "enough" and move on. I am now happily married (something I said i would never do, so never say never!)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2009): It seems that your are being isolated and left all alone…Why put yourself and children through that!!! If you are living separate lives why are you still in this? When a man does not pay for his children and hides his finances – something is up!! You need to establish a strong home front for your children – this situation does not sound healthy… Best of Luck….
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (2 June 2009):
 I think you should leave. I only have your words to picture the situation, but it seems that he's moving away from you, and there needs to be a reason why he´s keeping the money. Also, not supporting his children is just unacceptable. I don't think there is any way to mend this.
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A
female
reader, Rihannax  +, writes (2 June 2009):
 Leave him!
Marriage is love, this dont sound like love, if you havent had sex, or sleep in the same room thats not right, find someone that you can be happy and love instead of just care.
x
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