A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i've been in a relationship for almost 2 years but im constantly upset with him because he does not spend time with me, i invite him to places with me and he says he'll try but never shows up and tells me later he was caught up with somethings, i dont want to have my hopes raised but i get so happy when im with him, is spending time with me too much to ask for?, should i get myself ready to have myself dumped? but whenever we talk about this he tells me he is sorry and that he has even considered marrige with me but needs more time since im constantly upset with him over petty thingswhat should i be preparing myself for? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, softtouchmale2003  +, writes (17 October 2009):
 Love requires some devotion of emotions, affection and TIME.Time is the most valuable commodity with love. If he can't move heaven and earth to spend time with you, then it means that emotionally, he's distant from you.This could be for several reasons. Men sometimes need a great deal of time to pursue work issues, and income issues. But if that were the case and he truly was committed to you, he would tell you that and ask you to support him there. But in this case, from what little you've said, he's ignoring you and neglecting you be denying you love and time.Sounds like you should start looking for a man who is capable of making the efforts to be there with you, and also remember, love's a 2 way street. You have to make the efforts together and for each other.Here, he's not giving you enough time, which tells me something else means more to him than you. Without knowing what that is, I'd say he's done everything so far but dump you.On the other hand, if he has children, those will come first, and so you have to understand that. But you didn't mention that issue, so I assume he doesn't have children.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (17 October 2009):
Preparing yourself!!! Read what you've written. This guy doesn't spend time with you, he stands you up and lies, then has the nerve to say he's sorry and is even considering marriage but won't because you're angry over petty things! He's using you and abusing you. Don't allow yourself to be second best in his closed life. Dump him and find someone who will respect you. This guy doesnt' care about you at all.
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