A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have agreed to stay friends with the man I used to date the last year. Although we are going out sometimes, we are only friends. Although I have told him my true feelings in the past, he did't really change his mind and now I accept him as a friend and always I am careful to express to him that I see him as a friend of mine because I don't want to give him the opportunity to reject me if I tell him again my true feelings. However, sometimes it's really difficult to be calm when I go out with him because he will usually make me jealous as he talks with others. I try to be calm and show him indifference for his actions. Sometimes he arranges to go out with friends of his. His friends are polite to me but I don't have any interest for them. Should I be impolite and indifferent to them or be as friendly as I can without showing them special interest? And with the man i care about should i show indifference at all or tell him my real feelings?
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female
reader, pastfirst  +, writes (26 January 2009):
 I really don't see much point in this friendship.
You're obviously unhappy and he's been honest, and made it clear to you that he only wants you for friendship.
If you can stay friends with him without your emotions being envolved, carry on by all means.
But if you get jealous and upset every time he talks to a girl, find other friends and tell him you'd rather not see him.
After all, you don't seem to have much in common with his friends either.
A
female
reader, Ginalolabridga  + ♥, writes (26 January 2009):
 Hi,
As you are just friends as such it will be difficult to stop him being the way he is because you have nothing concrete with him apart from friendship, if you were a couple and were more than friends then he may well have to look at ways he could change certain behaviours for now he doesn't feel he has to do that because of your situation and as long as you both continue as this he may well not know how you feel unless you bring this to his attention. I would be polite around his friends civility cost nothing, you could talk some of the issues over with him as regards to how you feel i.e. jealousy etc; but then he may well say you have no need to feel like this so i think it depends on what it is he is doing is this with other females he is making you feel like this? always best to talk things over, even the best of friends can be brutally honest with one another!
Gina
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