A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:He knows I am the One but I don't know if he is. I like him and I want to continue to be with him but is it ok to tell him that when he asks me if he's the one and if I could see myself having children with him? Is it ok to say "I don't know" or does it automatically mean we shouldn't be together anymore? We've been together 5 months and known each other 1.5 years. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): It might hurt him, but best to be honest if he asks. I wouldn't bring it up, but if he asks if you will love him forever, you should say, "I don't know yet.' Honesty is always the best policy. Good luck
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (3 June 2009):
I get the impression that he has fancied you for a fair bit of that 1.5 years. So now he has you, he thinks he's home and dry and is planning the kids names.
As for whether you should be honest... it's a tough one. What ever you say is going to hurt him a bit but it's far far far better to do it a bit now than lie and then dump him and break his heart when he has an engagement ring in his hand.
So yes, tell him that you have only been with him a little time and he is pushing you a bit far.
If he just chilled out a bit and stopped buying wedding magazines then you might actually find you like him more.
Sit him down and don't say you don't know how you feel, but tell him that all this talk of kids and marriage and retiring to a farm in Norfolk with 5 million pet lizards is freaking you out and pushing you away. Ask him to chill out and have some fun with you rather than looking at schools.
It could be that, like me, in your mid 20's you are far more interested in having the cash and freedom to do all the festivals and drinking and having fun that you couldn't do before now. You can do that with him, with out having to commit to a life time together.
Good Luck!! xx
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