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male
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anonymous
writes: I'm really torn. About one year ago I was working at a phone agency when I met this really cute, funny, all-around great girl. Over the course of a few months we became friends and that's when I started wanting her as more than just a friend. I made up excuses to be with her whenever I could. My older sister (who also worked there) told me a few times that I should ask her out, claiming she "liked me too" but I figured she was teasing (always has about my relationships). Unfortunately, I never got the courage to ask her out and in January, I moved onto another job. Well, I met up with her by chance a few weeks ago and I walked away with her email address, promising myself I'd tell her this time. However, I've discovered she's now seeing someone (she wasn't before). She's 6 years older than me (I'm 21, she's 27) but I feel I'm going to explode if I don't tell her how I feel. I need some help here.
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female
reader, mommyofthree +, writes (19 November 2005):
 If you know she is seeing someone then you also know telling her may put her current relationship in jeopardy. There are a couple of things that could happen, she could be delighted break it off with the guy and fall madly in love with you, she could thank you politely and tell you she would rather just be friends, or she could be hurt that you would tell her something like that knowing that she is involved. Armed with this knowledge you now have to decide if the risks out weigh the possible benefits. If it were me, I would wait it out a while longer to see if she is sending out any signals that she is interested in that kind of relationship with you.
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