A
male
age
41-50,
*edsoxfan69
writes:I have been with with my girlfreind for four months, we planned a trip to Jamaica and she has been talking about eloping after we get there, she went online and even looked up everything we have to do and how long we have to be on the island before we can elope. Does this mean she is really in love with me? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Eyespy17 +, writes (6 March 2009):
It's a very romantic idea, very impuslive, and as a fellow wild child, I see the appeal.
But I'd go and just enjoy a wildly romantic vacation, for now. If you're between 30 and 35, I'm sure you know how much can change.
Just tell her you don't want to rush such a life altering decision. And if she's not okay with that, then I'd say she's more in love with the concept of "being married", than you.
A
female
reader, wonderingcat  +, writes (6 March 2009):
 elope
· v. run away secretly in order to get married.
– DERIVATIVES elopement n. eloper n.
– ORIGIN C16 (in the sense ‘abscond, run away’): from Anglo-Norman Fr. aloper.
I am a bit confused here. Are you talking about the act of "elopement" which denotes the running away, the secrecy, of getting married? Or the getting married itself? Why do you have to be on the island for several days/weeks before you dan "elope" (i.e. do you want to run away from Jamaica??)
Having said that, it sounds like you are not objecting to her plans at all. So, maybe you are just as bad as she is in being an incurable romantic? Or maybe, you are totally head over heels in love with her? And maybe, you are hoping that she will declare her love to by popping the big question to you?
Yes, 4 months does appear to be too short a period of time to get to know someone and decide to spend the rest of the term of your natural life with. But hey, to each his own. I know a couple of people who got married after dating for only 2 months, and 10 years later they are still happily married.
I only have one suggestion: Prepare a Pre-Nup!
Ummm what was the question before?
Cat
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 March 2009): Wait I am confused, did you even propose? And I have to agree with the other aunts here, marriage after 4 months? You barely KNOW each other yet. Maybe tell her you want to wait and if she doesnt want to stick it out then you have your answer dont you? Seriously, dont do it this soon, you will regret it.
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A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (6 March 2009):
 How can we tell from one paragraph if she loves you or just wants to marry you for the money? Four months isn't very long to decide to get married, in fact that's a very short engagement.
Have you guys told each other how you feel properly? Have you talked about getting married before? It's not something to blunder into! I'm guessing you haven't proposed to her?
I am all for eloping it would have saved me a fortune and cut out a lot of stress. But I think you should still go through an engagement, and a lot longer together before deciding to get married!
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A
female
reader, sappygirl +, writes (6 March 2009):
 it doesn't matter if she's in love with you. Are you in love with her? 4 months is too early to even think about marraige. Take the time to get to know each other first.
Don't do it!!!
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