A
female
age
26-29,
*caredForLove
writes:Hi agony aunts :) So, I'm having a sex issue. My girlfriend and I have been together for 13 months, she lives 4 hours away. We've met twice, and have had sex. In the beginning of our relationship, my girlfriend was very...sexual. She talked about sex often and we sexted a lot. It was like that up until about maybe the 6th or 7th month. She wanted it less...and. I was considerate of her feelings and didn't pressure her into skype sex or anything she didn't want to. We met a few days after our 10 month and had incredible sex, for hours on end. Each night she was here. But when she left she was back to her "I'm-never-aroused-I-don't-wanna-talk-about-sex" self. We met again a month after and had not as incredible sex, but still, good. Not for hours, but again, we didn't get the chance. And when she left again she still was very distant sexually. Okay sex isn't everything in a relationship, I know, and I'm not a creep about it but really, what's changed from when we first started dating? Am I not attractive to her? I'm just confused and lonely and I always feel awkward bringing it up because I feel like she won't want to talk about it. Even though, if she wants something sexually, I'm happy to help, but if I do, she'll quickly shut it down. I don't get it. Help? What's wrong with me? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (3 June 2013):
 13 months together and only 4 hours apart and you've only seen each other twice?
Let's start with this is not a real relationship.
I admit that 4 hours apart is not "drive every weekend" length, although I would do 3 hours and I did a 2 hour commute every weekend for a year when my now husband was my boyfriend and lived in a different state.....
13 months together, 4 hours apart you should have 6-13 visits MINIMUM already. The fact that you have only met twice is very telling.
In addition, having only met twice, SEX should not even be on the table yet.
I have to be honest, if I was having an LDR with a guy who could not manage to see me until nearly a year together and all he wanted to do was have sex or sext or talk about sex, I'd be very put off.
there is nothing wrong with you other than you want something from this relationship differently than what she wants.
IF you two can't manage to see each other once a month bare minimum, it's probably time to end the relationship.
If you don't want to end the relationship, then you need to step up and see her more often and nurture the relationship and her. Nurtured loved women are more sexual.
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