A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my best friend have had feelings for each other for a long time. Now me, im very respectful when it comes to the ladies. I understand that if someone is too young for sex, then thats the way it is and im fine with that. There is a 4 year age gap between me and my best friend. She is 15 i am 19. We want to date, and we understand that she is too young for anything sexual. And i can live with that because she is just the most amazing girl ive ever met, she treats me soo amazingly great. I want opinions on if we should date, keepign in mind we know about all of the sex stuff. Thanks evryone!
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2008): Ok, I am apologising. I did not mean to say you or any other nineteen year old was a "low life" male. But, I do stand by my statement that a fifteen year old girl is too young for you to be having sex with. And if you can be friends without you hitting on her, that is OK. But, you must have that respect...for her and for her age. You ARE a legal adult. She is a minor. The law makes these differences for a very good reason. You should not flaunt them.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2008): PoliticallyLawful, it may may be "legal", in that it avoids the "statutory rape" charges. But that does not make it "right" or moral. A nineteen year old male who has a sexual relationship with a fifteen year old girl is is a low form of male. He is bordering on pedophilia. He is at best a very immature person who is unable to have a relationship with another female his own age. You can talk "numbers" as long as you want, but this is the truth. And as a very wise lawyer of my own country once said, "The Law is an ass."
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A
male
reader, somerandomdude9999 +, writes (22 July 2008):
 I think if you like her as much as you claim its a good idea to wait. (wait as in stay with her and be patient for the most romantic part of it all) If you enjoy her company go for it man stay with her. Keep dating her man!
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A
male
reader, PoliticalyLawful +, writes (21 July 2008):
depending what state you live in the Laws change, let's pick an example. In New Jersey you can have a sexual relashionship with some one under 18 as long as thers a 4 year gap. If you were in New Jersey Sex is legal.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2008): Illegal to have sex. Not to date.
Seriously, here in Australia no one ven bats an eyelid if a 19 year old dates a 15 year old. And yes, we know the fact sex is illgal at that point will not stop them.
I mean why else would they give sex ed lessons to 13 year olds if they didn't know they are going to go out a procreate no matter how much you try and ban it.
My own sister dated an 18 year old when she was 14 and he was a nice guy. It didn't last, but they wen't out for quite number of years before parting on decent terms.
So don't listen to the nay-sayers here who seem to regard any form of sexual experimentation during the period of life where you SHOULD be experimenting (14-25) as the personification of evil.
If it's illegal to have sex, then don't have sex. You can make out and all of that without any risk of jail-time and making out is cool... a bit of a tease though.
You can date, and don't even give any people that try and bitch about you any of your time, let them have their complaints, lord knows its all some of them ever have.
Flynn 24
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2008): As far as I am concerned you seem a very respectful guy [believe me i wish more guys were like you] and not everybody will ever be happy, and people will comment etc. but as long as you are both happy, who cares... go for it =) again as far as this goes i don't know you personally but from what you have said you sound like a decent guy who deserves a decent girl. good luck =) x
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2008): i think you should date..as you noe it is illegal for her to have sex and keep that in mind and dont have it until after then i think it would be fine. seeing as you both have the same feelings i dnt see why not.
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (20 July 2008):
 First of all, in the USA what you are wanting to do (date and get sexual...) is illegal for your age group.
Next, you are OK with waiting another 5 years or so for sex? Are there religious reasons at play here? If not, I find it odd that a man at his sexual peak is going to hold off dating other women his own age for relationships.
I also find it odd that your best friend is a 15 year old girl. Is she very mature, or are you very immature?
Are you sure that you are not just setting up an excuse to not date at all out of some fear of intimacy or perhaps (and I mean this seriously, and not as any insult) to avoid dealing with the issues that you might not even be into girls that much?
Your entire situation screams red flags to me.
-Frank B Kermit
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A
female
reader, jazzkat +, writes (20 July 2008):
friend tom is right, you are the adult in the situation, so you have to be responsible. you have to understand that though it may not seem like it, there is a huge mental gap between 15 and 19...try to remember when you were that young, and the way you acted, thought, etc.if you really like her that much, and if she is such a wonderful girl, then you should just wait for her to grow up and experience her teenage life. if things work out i can guarantee she will love you more for it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2008): aww i wish every guy was like u..but sadly theres only few and luckly ur one of them..shes 15 and ur 19 it might not seem like a BIG deal but to her it might be cuz
u probably lost ur virginity i mean idk did u??
but she didnt shes not even in that stage
idk wat her parents would think
but u can ask her out
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2008): It's good that you are respectful of her age...and of girls in general. It is a pretty big gap in age at this point. Her parents would probably think so too. She has has a lot of things to experience yet that you already have. She needs to finish high school and enjoy all the things that she can at her age. It is OK to stay friends, but I would advise not trying to make it more serious. You are a legal "adult"...and you should think like one. The law certainly considers you one, ..don't forget that.
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