A
male
age
51-59,
*corpio1112
writes:I was in a year long relationship that ended about 3 months ago when my girlfriend ended our relationship. The problem was that my ex-girlfriend, who lived with me, wants to have children and get married. I was married twice before and had always expressed that I was not interested in a third marriage and unsure if I wanted to have children. I have none from either marriage.After thinking it over, think I made a big mistake. I am scared to get married again, but she is the real deal and is worth it. I'm also leaning towards wanting children.We've remained on friendly terms, and I recently decided to tell her of my mistakes and asked her to consider giving me a second chance. She made it very clear that she did not want to move backwards, she's moved on and is in a "happy place" now. She also said she is no longer in love with me and there is no chance for us. She also said she needs space.Should I pack it in and just move on, or should I try to win back the woman who I haven't stop loving?
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ex girlfriend, move on, my ex, needs space Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Scorpio1112 +, writes (6 August 2008):
Scorpio1112 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks again PeterPan. I will remain friends with her, but let her have the space she's asking for and take it at a slow pace.
A
male
reader, PeterPan +, writes (6 August 2008):
 I think your best possibilities here are to have a friend that knows you on a more intimate level than most others. I don't necessarily think that you two should cut contact with each other, but beware that the immediate future might seem "strange" since you've confessed your change of heart...
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A
male
reader, Scorpio1112 +, writes (4 August 2008):
Scorpio1112 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your advice. So far, they both seem to make sense, although now I'll have to see "Sex in the City" which I was hoping to avoid!Some of my confusion is that prior to talking to her about my mistakes, we were friendly towards each other and would call to see how the other was doing. More recently, I went on vacation, and she watched my dog for me while staying in my apt for a few days. Now, I know that I haven't moved on, but if she did, why would she want to remain friends and do these favors for me? Even after she shot me down, she said was was hoping we could remain friends.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (4 August 2008):
You obviously hurt her very badly and she has worked hard to get over you.
I can't tell you that there is no chance of you winning her back because I don't know her and I don't know if she is still just angry and hurt, or because she really has stopped loving you.
But my gut tells me that you had your chance and you messed it up.
Take her to see Sex and the City to film. It's basically exactly the same situation as yours but with more expensive shoes.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
male
reader, PeterPan +, writes (4 August 2008):
I hate to be the one to tell you this, but I think that you need to pack up and move on yourself. If anything here, you are walking away with some valuable personal revelations that you take with you... being married for a third time might not be as bad as you think and you could see yourself being a father. I don't think your ex is going to be responsive to your advances if she told you in no uncertain terms that she's found herself as well.
Like I said, I hate to give people bad news, but I think that it's take to face facts that this race has been run.
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