A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I went out to a bar last night, where some friends were playing in a band. I had a few drinks before I came out. Whenever I arrived, I found my ex girlfriend and her new boyfriend were there as well. At first it didn't bother me, but as the night went on I started to feel tired, and I'd had a few more drinks. I ended up feeling really aggressive. I was openly complaining about how my ex is with somebody else. On reflection I can't believe I was like that, because (and this is the god's truth) the relationship I had with my ex was rubbish. She was a terrible girlfriend.So, what's to blame? I don't want to blame it on alcohol, because it's no excuse for my behavior. I think I'm just envious that she of all people has found somebody else, while I'm on my own. This question probably doesn't make me sound like a great guy, but I believe that I am, and my friends are always saying that I'm a nice guy. I'd really like to have someone in my life again. Don't I deserve to have somebody?
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male
reader, alphamale  +, writes (21 May 2009):
it's natural to feel that way, specially if she left you for him, but it's not that big of a deal. it's happened to the best of us. just move one and try to imrpove yourself. it'll raise your confidence, talk to girls, go out. Most girls like attention, when you stop giving it to her, she'll feel it. stop being the hunter and be the prey that girls fight for. be cocky, girls love cockiness. work out, get a makeover. show her that you're better off without her too.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2009): You are probably such a nice guy you think you can never have an off evening. You did last night and you realise it, which a lot wouldn't. Don't beat yourself up about it. You deserve to find someone nice yourself.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (21 May 2009):
 That was just alcohol + lonliness my friend, nothing more and it happens to all of us! Take me for example, I've just ended a relationship with a guy who was so wrong for me in so many ways and I wasnt even that into him, yet when I am on my own with a drink in my hand I find myself missing him and thinking of contacting him! Now that is purely because I have had a drink and I'm feeling a bit lonely, nothing more!
Seeing an ex moving on is always difficult, regardless of how you felt about them. It is just the idea that they have someone and you dont, but you should think of it this way....you should feel sorry for the poor guy that is stuck with her!
Believe me it is much better to be single and on your own for a while than waste time with the wrong person. You are just missing having a relationship right now which is totally normal atfer you have broken up with someone. This feeling will be around for a few months but pretty soon you will just feel happy again being on your own. I struggle being single because I love the company of having another person around, I love the hugs and kisses, the affection, all that jazz. But eventually I realise that being alone isnt so bad, and that I quite like my own company and that being single is acutally pretty good at times because you are free to do whatever you want without taking another person into consideration.
You of course deserve to be with someone but you are looking for someone special, whereas she has probably just dived into a relationship with the first guy that came along. You say she was a pretty rubbish girlfriend, so you dont want to have another one of those do you?! Just take your time, wait until you find a girl that is going to be pretty amazing. Dont settle for someone who is "ok" just because you are lonely, wait for the right girl to come along. Believe me if you do this, you will have the last laugh over your ex because this new guy will have dumped her whereas you will have a great relationship with a great girl!
This new guy will just be a rebound for her, and he will soon realise that she is nothing special either! Just forget about it, enjoy having some time to yourself and wait for that special girl to come along and knock you off your feet!
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries +, writes (21 May 2009):
 hun of course you do!
and you don't sound like a bad guy you sound like a lovely guy and are just really gutted that your ex whom you've said was a rubbish girlfriend has gotten someone where as you are so nice and stuff and you've not gotten someone special yet.
i understand what you mean i always feel like that when i think of my ex how horrible they were and then they get with someone i think oh how mean i'm not a bad person but i guess you just got to wait.
i mean who knows how she got this guy maybe to him she's amazing and the type of girl he wants and for you maybe not.
it's a typical ex kind of situation i mean i get jealous too.
i think in some ways you hoped and thought you would get someone way before she did because of the way she was with you but maybe she is different towards this new guy or maybe the way she is, is the type this guy was looking for.
you do deserve someone special of course you do it'll take a bit of time but don't give up :)
she's out there if you need anything else message me:) i'm more than happy to help
x
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A
female
reader, gemmaxx09 +, writes (21 May 2009):
 its a normal feeling to be jealous wen u see an ex with someone else, you prpbably miss the company you had even if she wasnt the best gf, and no u cnt blame it on alcohol but drink doesnt help, ur reactions are different when drunk, and if she is as terrible as ur saying the person that she is with cant be that great himself.
You know yourself that you are a nice guy, u kno its wrong to feel that aggressive and that is a good thing, if you thort it was the right behaviour then that would be another story
When the time comes you will have a person in your life, you dnt deserve to have just somebody, you deserve to hve someone special
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