A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Me and my partner split up after a series of rows now altho this was a very short split up when he come back i found a new number in his phone that belonged to a girl he chats to on the internet i also found a txt from her that indicated he had been to see her that same night, he strongly denies this and says she sent it to the wrong person im having a hard time believing this as he wont prove it, i now dont know what to do as i should be believing what he's telling me but i just cant. Any ideas on how i can get past this?
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female
reader, mercedes34  +, writes (23 May 2007):
 I know the situation you are in...As I myself had been in a marrage and we split for 13 years and got back together..I noticed that he was talking to another girl..In doing so I over heard his conversation with her..Which he expressed the words I love you...I did confront him with this..I told him that there isn't a place for two women in his life for him to love...That there was just me..And if he trully loved this person that he should be with them. I wasn't playing games life it too short I was willing to let him go once again he decided that I was important enough to keep now...We do have a daughter together..But all in all you should not have to question his devotion to you...Simply confront him yet again..Let him know that you know there is something going on..don't let him have the upper hand...As he will deny it...take his phone and show him I would also look at the history in the phone...All you have to do is push send it will tell you the time and date of every phone call for the past few months...Then your suspenstions will be gone..
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2007): How long did this short split up go on for (days, weeks)??
Was he in contact with this girl, during the split? or after he got back together with you?
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A
male
reader, nologo  +, writes (23 May 2007):
 As I see trust in relationship is a must for you.
If you can't trust him, then why you are together.
First, "i found a new number in his phone that belonged to a girl he chats to on the internet"
Second, "i also found a txt from her that indicated he had been to see her that same night"
This is still not enough for you - do you test your partner?
"i should be believing what he's telling me but i just cant"
A new series of rows will be next - is that what you need?
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A
male
reader, DV1 +, writes (23 May 2007):
 He's lying.
DV1
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2007): Wait and see if he gets any more and stop worrying until that happens. He may have cheered himself up by chatting someone up while you were appart but if he is really happy to have you back then he would't surely try and ruin it?
Wait for messages but if you alert him he will be careful to delete so stay calm. This may seem like stupid worry tomorrow, on the other hand instinct is a very powerful thing and you must have reasons for not trusting him. The instant reaction is to think "I must know, NOW". Well you probably can't, so wait and see and all will be revealed. I hope you are wrong.
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