A
male
age
36-40,
*igin1986
writes:I'm 22 and my wife and I have been together since I was 15 and married since I was 19. When we were dating we had a healthy sex life but when we moved in together it stopped altogether. It went from 2 times a week to 1, maybe every 2 or 3 months, if I'm lucky. I've tried everything under the stars I can think of: help with all the housework, help put the kid to bed, give the kid a bath, rub her back, but nothing I seem to do helps. I can't even touch her now, anywhere. I know a relationship isn't based on sex but I don't know what to do. I don't even ask anymore. There is no use because I get shot down. I love her very much but I just don't know what to do. If anyone has any advice please let me know. I would greatly appreciate it.
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female
reader, erynfaye  +, writes (9 June 2009):
I highly recommend the book The Sex-Starved Marriage by Michele Weiner Davis. It talks about all the possible reasons why the two of you are struggling with this issue, as well as ways to break the cycle of lack of intimacy. It's an easy read, and the suggestions are simple and yet effective.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): Try romancing her. Plan a surprise dinner. Remember anything from when you were just dating that was special to you both? Recreate that special thing. Maybe an old joke or playful moment could get you two going again. If nothing like this works why don't you sit her down and talk to her. Let her know you miss the closeness and fun you two had when you were more sexually active. If nothing at all is working suggest couple's therapy, FUN!
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A
female
reader, DIANACM +, writes (4 June 2009):
Maybe if you try talking to her,you must know that communication is what we all need in a marriage. When y ask her and she doesnt answer you question thats beacuse ther is something going on with her, if you know what I mean. I hate to be rud but I we dont tell u nobody else will.
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